The traditional National Pastime of the United States is baseball. I don't understand the allure of smacking a ball with a stick of wood and then running around in circles while making sure to step on white bags placed evenly around said circle. And then there are things about designated hitters and fly outs, and when you get a home run you instantly score, except if it happens to fly past some giant yellow posts and then it doesn't count. You can't swing at everything that the 'pitcher' throws at you, either, because sometimes he will try to trick you by trying to make you swing at throws that are far past where you can hit them, and then you are charged a strike, and if you get a few of those (three or four) then you get out. If you get three outs, you lose.
You only get nine turns, and your opponent gets nine turns, so there's really no rush. Baseball is pretty laid back. According to the statistics, the hitters do not even hit most of the time. A good 'average' is hitting 30% of the time. At your best, you're going to miss 70% of the time. If hitting balls counted as exams, baseball players would all get F's.
And somehow, America loves it. Philadelphia loves it too. We love it so much we had a riot over it when we won the World Series (which is the grand high game which determines the champion of the world, obviously). Of course, we riot over a lot of things, so that really tells you nothing. We love to riot. Rioting and causing trouble and being mean are like Philadelphia's national pastime.
Guess what Second Life's National Pastime is?
C'mon, take a guess.
Showing posts with label Linden Overlords. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Linden Overlords. Show all posts
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Your Build Is Bad
I am going to start a new feature. I will go across the grid and sample all the lovely new builds our Grand Department of Public Works and Utilities have erected for glorious promotion of Linden Lab.
Today's victim is the rail bridge running through the snow sims. This particular view was taken in Heaton.
First, I'd like to comment on the boring look. The design is reminiscent of the kind of Lego block bridges I'd build as a child: A simple platform held up by a few lame supports. Even the material induces a yawn (ooo, stone. Boring).
This is being built on Linden Lab land! It has tons of prims available for you to create a rail line. An actual honest to goodness rail line. And a bridge! Of all the bridge designs, you chose 'Nostalgic Stonehenge'? No, wait, strike that. Stone Age bridges were more pleasing to the eye.
I'd also like to point out the horrible configuration. Why cross the river? In the next sim over, the line scoots across the river AGAIN. It crosses this river for no discernible purpose. If they did so solely for the chance to erect a bridge, they have failed. Their bridge is ugly and boring.
They could and should have continued to run the tracks along the road, as they had for the previous ten miles. Someone wanted to get fancy. Too bad their imagination didn't match their drive.
Let's look at the nitty gritty details, shall we? You cannot see or tell from this snapshot, but there is massive texture overlap present. The prims flash like a Parisian neon signboard. These builders are supposed to be the 'best of the best', hired specifically by Linden Lab for creating lovely public builds. And this is the best they could do? I've cobbled together tacos textured better than this. In fact, even the newest of builders and sculptors I have talked to always do one thing first: make sure the textures look right. Failure, as Winter would say.
Of course, they can't manage to align the prims right, so perhaps it is too much to expect texture alignment. I can clearly see overlap between the support and the tracks. And the foundation is twisted off base of the support. Again, Stone Age cavemen (haha, Geico) could at the least make sure everything is centered. You could probably excuse the support/track junction (by arguing the support is forming a 'cup' in which the track sits), but there is simply no excuse for the improper and twisted junction between support/foundation.
This bridge is bad. The rail line is bad. Even though the builder isn't a Mole, it is built on Linden Lab land and set to the Linden Maintenance group, so this does indeed have the Linden Stamp of Approval. This is what they consider acceptable to show off on the main grid.
Grade: F
329
Today's victim is the rail bridge running through the snow sims. This particular view was taken in Heaton.
First, I'd like to comment on the boring look. The design is reminiscent of the kind of Lego block bridges I'd build as a child: A simple platform held up by a few lame supports. Even the material induces a yawn (ooo, stone. Boring).
This is being built on Linden Lab land! It has tons of prims available for you to create a rail line. An actual honest to goodness rail line. And a bridge! Of all the bridge designs, you chose 'Nostalgic Stonehenge'? No, wait, strike that. Stone Age bridges were more pleasing to the eye.
I'd also like to point out the horrible configuration. Why cross the river? In the next sim over, the line scoots across the river AGAIN. It crosses this river for no discernible purpose. If they did so solely for the chance to erect a bridge, they have failed. Their bridge is ugly and boring.
They could and should have continued to run the tracks along the road, as they had for the previous ten miles. Someone wanted to get fancy. Too bad their imagination didn't match their drive.
Let's look at the nitty gritty details, shall we? You cannot see or tell from this snapshot, but there is massive texture overlap present. The prims flash like a Parisian neon signboard. These builders are supposed to be the 'best of the best', hired specifically by Linden Lab for creating lovely public builds. And this is the best they could do? I've cobbled together tacos textured better than this. In fact, even the newest of builders and sculptors I have talked to always do one thing first: make sure the textures look right. Failure, as Winter would say.
Of course, they can't manage to align the prims right, so perhaps it is too much to expect texture alignment. I can clearly see overlap between the support and the tracks. And the foundation is twisted off base of the support. Again, Stone Age cavemen (haha, Geico) could at the least make sure everything is centered. You could probably excuse the support/track junction (by arguing the support is forming a 'cup' in which the track sits), but there is simply no excuse for the improper and twisted junction between support/foundation.
This bridge is bad. The rail line is bad. Even though the builder isn't a Mole, it is built on Linden Lab land and set to the Linden Maintenance group, so this does indeed have the Linden Stamp of Approval. This is what they consider acceptable to show off on the main grid.
Grade: F
329
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Random Thoughts In August
I've got nothing in particular to say, so I'm just going to write whatever pops into my head at the moment.
I saw an article yesterday which discussed the dangers of twitting and facebooking about the workplace. Why isn't this common sense? How stupid are people? Here's a simple rule of thumb anytime the asinine urge to publish anything about your place of current employment: If it's something you wouldn't say to your boss to his or her face (or gossipy coworker who might tell the whole front office), then don't stick it on the internet.
It's like the certified moron who I worked with in my last co-op/internship/however-my-school-wants-to-call-it-today. This piece of work decided to fudge the numbers on his timesheet. First off, doing so is intensely wrong as it is akin to outright stealing. You're taking
Second, I'm an inquisitive soul and asked just how much he worked 'overtime'. My dear friend must have slept at work in order to achieve seventy hours a week. You read that right. Seventy hours (70!) a week. C'mon! If you're going to lie, at least be smart about it. Throw something realistic in there.
Third, the entire workplace was wired. You couldn't sneeze without your boss, your boss' boss, and his boss knowing about it. I went just a minute over on my lunch break, and I got a rather cold email about it. Don't worry so much, because for a few days, I accidentally went in ten minutes early and worked too much for the time I was reporting (I had a long commute and always overestimated the amount of time I needed. Also, SEPTA is horrible). But they saw I spent those minutes pissing away on the internet, so it all turned out well.
In short, don't mess with your time sheet. It's a dumb thing to do.
---
Why do people write 'your' instead of 'you're'? I've seen it more and more and, as a certified Grammar Nazi, it's starting to grind on me. I'm not above the occasional error myself (my talking grammar is downright atrocious), but I do try to make sure my audience can tell when I'm talking possessive and when I'm describing something of yours.
Simply put, saying, "your an idiot" will not sway me towards your point of view. "You're an idiot". Get it right.
Also, has 'lol' replaced the period? "your an idiot lol why cant u c that your an idiot lol?" is fairly typical of the internet these days, a fairly sad revelation. I used to defend the denizens of the internet against my snobby friends. I used to say, "Sure, a few folks talk like a drunken seal slapping a keyboard but most people write intelligently." Now, I feel silly and foolish.
But the absolute worst error trophy is held by the number substitutions. "got 2 go 2 8 sum dinner, bbl 4 u" Numbers have only one place, and that's to quantify something in simple digits (after all, writing VII or 'seven' to do multiplication is not easy and is quite painful and counter intuitive).
The only internet jargon I believe has any use is emoticons. They are quite handy in determining the attitude with which a given statement is being delivered. "You're such a fool :D" indicates friendly ribbing, while "You're such a fool" is an offensive impersonal accusation. Although, for some reason, I still have this mental image that emote use carries sarcastic connotations. Maybe it's because I have the arrogant assumption I can parse the 'air' of a conversation without being outright told, and maybe because I feel condescended to, as if I am a child who needs direction in the mannerisms of adults. Maybe I'm just stupid.
---
One of my real life friends was lambasted the other day by some elderly vet because she ran an American flag but not that black POW/MIA one. What a troop-hating unAmerican bitch. She was too flustered to offer much of a rebuttal and personally I'm too much of a coward to have said anything in her place.
But now I'm on the internet anonymous (more or less), so I'm saying I'd have told the twat to piss off. What, if I don't wear everything on my damn sleeve, then I must not support or agree with it? It's stupid, anyway. Why fly a flag for it? I assume no one is cackling with glee at the soldiers stuffed away in POW camps or Missing in Action (most of whom probably, sadly, deceased). I assume most Americans do carry sympathy for such soldiers and their families.
I don't need silly ribbons or flags to display how I feel. If you're so goddamn curious, then go ahead and ask. My house is not a battleship, I shouldn't have to rig a complex network of flags to tell the world everything about me.
And really, I think if you waste the time erecting a flagpole and flying the Stars and Stripes on it, you're probably as patriotic as they come. Especially since everyone I've spotted with flags always seem to keep them clean, do all the right flag protocol, etc. If they were heartless enemies of the state, I doubt they'd bother.
Also, I've never been quite sure, but does it cover all POWs/MIAs, or just American ones? Are the Iraqi and Afghanistan POWs allowed to rot just because they're our enemies and terrorists? Sure, if you accept the idea that our POW camps are ten times better than the homes we caught them in, with good food, water, and ninety channels of digital cable it might seem like a pretty good deal. But would you want to be locked up thousands of miles away from your family? Even if they lived in a shithole? I doubt it. For example, the Army barracks might be better in quality of life than the North Philadelphia slum you came from, but you still come home, don't you?
And that's assuming, of course, that the camps are as we're told they are. Chances are, they're probably pretty shitty. I suppose that's the cold reality of life, after all, they are trying to kill us. But the point remains: aren't they still POWs? I'm willing to bet most of them don't even give two figs about Al Qaeda or anything, they're just defending themselves against an invasion (both cultural and martial) in their homes. Extreme in their methods, perhaps, but so were the Bosnians when fighting against the Serbians, or the North against the South, or the British against the colonists (and vice versa for each of those cases).
Maybe I'm too naive.
---
I know it's just practice for the real world, but it always irks me when I have to write a paper on whatever lab for school. Why? Because inevitably it's just regurgitation of old news. I wrote a lab report on gel electrophoresis and using it to determine the specific sequence of a bacterial genome. Old news. When 'researching' it, I dredged up a billion papers from a million years ago on the thousands of ways to approach this method and so on. If I was inclined, I could have ripped them completely and handed them in as my paper.
My professors wouldn't notice, but they would still mark me down on their seemingly arbitrary standards. On one occasion, I had ten points off because my abstract (the quick run-down you see at the beginning of scientific papers) wasn't detailed enough. It was almost a thousand words. Any more, and it wouldn't be an abstract anymore, it might as well have been the paper itself.
Methods/Materials is another one they like to peg you on. The rule of thumb is that if it's taught on an undergrad level, you can safely generalize about it. For instance, I don't need to go into the details of how I prepared a sample for mass spectrometry (unless I had some brand new revolutionary method on it). I can just say I performed a mass spec. analysis and you can reasonably fill in the blank. But then, they tell me to put in such details so they know I know what I'm doing. When I do so, they mark off points because I didn't write with a scientific audience in mind.
My introductions and results/conclusions are flawless. Yet the stupid abstract and methods murder me.
Oh, and 'future' studies is also laughable. Yeah, what could I POSSIBLY do with this basic technique? How could I possibly expand upon it? I know! A ten second Google search could give me twenty answers because the technique or concept itself is so basic! Imagine learning the basics of a language, and then being asked 'What could you do in the future to expand your knowledge?' Er, Der, maybe try to hold conversations with those fluent in said language? Maybe visit that particular country? Maybe have your teacher move into the finer nuances of it? Or asking a builder in Second Life: "Now that you know how to resize a prim, what are some possible future investigations of this technique?" You'd laugh it off, that's what you'd do.
I figure if you have no clue, not even a semblance of how to take such a middle school level concept to the next level, you probably have no business taking that line of study. At least, not without some serious backbreaking and extremely painful work on your part.
---
As you might have guessed, my field is heavy into science. That's not saying much. I'm told it's a hard field, but personally I think anything can be hard if you don't have the right mind. For example, I cannot speak another language to save my life. Eight years of Spanish in High school and the best I can manage is asking how you are today and that the dog is very fat. Oh, and that the train is blue and grey. Linguistics is definitely not for me.
But, on my mother's side of the family, I'm going to be the first one in that family to get a college degree. And on my father's side, only the third (my father was a pharmacist, and his sister is a nurse). Pretty weighty! The result of this is that I am frequently poked into answering every single question about the universe.
Now, I do know a good deal of things. After all, you can't do what I do without knowing some basics. But asking me the details of astrophysics, I do not know. Or specifics in metallurgy. One person can only know so much. Ask me for the specific pathways for limb development, sure, but forget about the specific types of concrete.
Why? Because it isn't relevant, I guess. Concrete just don't factor much when you're investigating ACL tears. In fact, concrete is bad in such a scenario. Also, I haven't had much study into the specifics of concrete. It's an area outside my expertise. That's pretty important. You wouldn't ask your doctor to check out what's wrong with your sedan.
Which is why they always seem so disappointed when I tell them I don't know, and that I'd have to look it up. And then I feel bad because they feel let down. And then they feel bad that I feel bad because I feel I've let them down. A vicious cycle!
And then there's things no one knows. Why we age is something the world is constantly investigating over and over. And the reasons for it are very complex. No one quite understands. Which, by the way, is why it is heavy in research right now.
One final nail in the coffin is my reluctance to give an answer without checking my data three times over. I won't even give you an answer on the color of my hair without checking it in at least two mirrors and under different light conditions. Too cautious, perhaps, but it's helped immensely in the 'getting things right' category and helped me avoid the dreaded 'everything is totally wrong and I am so screwed'.
---
This blog was founded for two things. The first was to record the random acts of nonsense and writing that Jurin loves. It is certainly much handier to direct people to a simple website to read my crazy rather than getting me to log in and teleport over (at 4 AM Eastern time, I am more nasty and crabby than fun).
The other was to comment on just how crazy Linden Lab can be. Ok, well, more about Second Life in general, but Linden Lab is a big part of it. And I realize that I haven't been discussing them at all in the past few months. Maybe even half the year. I feel an explanation is owed.
I do not know what more to write about them. That is the simple truth. They are crazy and insane. Everyone hates their policies. Often, they bumble about and wreck things like a toddler who found his dad's gun and is now in a pottery shop with an angry bull. Sometimes they're right in whatever move they make. Sometimes they're wrong. And all too often, it is a rat race. After awhile, the feeling creeps into you that you have discussed this policy again, and again, and again, and the time is ripe to just let it die.
Take, for example, age verification. The whole deal with the 'Adult' rated parcels was beaten to death with the advent of age verification, which in turn was beaten to death with the banning of fake porn in that European country and its investigation into Second Life, which in turn was beaten to death with the first age players to settle on the grid. Since at least 2005 (2006 at the latest), we have been talking ourselves into circles!
And the reality is that some verification is required. Just like the sketchy videos on Youtube which ask if you're over 18 before it lets you view it. It's required in the sense of Linden Lab covering its ass. That's all there is, folks. The end.
The taking over of Xstreet is just but one episode of Linden Lab absorbing an existing institution in order to establish their own presence in that niche. This isn't news. And the endless discussions and debates about it have gone nowhere because everything to be said about it has been said more or less for the past four years.
That is why I stopped writing about Second Life, save for the occasional comment on blogs. I just don't feel there's a need to devote reams of useless nonsense, especially when what I say will likely be unoriginal and pointless.
Plus, the entire exercise is not dissimilar to shouting at the wind. Ari has often said that the Lab does listen, but frankly, I don't think so. They do what they want.
---
Why oh why is anyone surprised that SAT scores are still skewed? It's up there with the puzzlement people express towards Linden Labs. This is shown every year. Not like it matters anyway, because scores overall are trending down. At least, according to the article I read.
---
That's about all at the moment.
337
I saw an article yesterday which discussed the dangers of twitting and facebooking about the workplace. Why isn't this common sense? How stupid are people? Here's a simple rule of thumb anytime the asinine urge to publish anything about your place of current employment: If it's something you wouldn't say to your boss to his or her face (or gossipy coworker who might tell the whole front office), then don't stick it on the internet.
It's like the certified moron who I worked with in my last co-op/internship/however-my-school-wants-to-call-it-today. This piece of work decided to fudge the numbers on his timesheet. First off, doing so is intensely wrong as it is akin to outright stealing. You're taking
Second, I'm an inquisitive soul and asked just how much he worked 'overtime'. My dear friend must have slept at work in order to achieve seventy hours a week. You read that right. Seventy hours (70!) a week. C'mon! If you're going to lie, at least be smart about it. Throw something realistic in there.
Third, the entire workplace was wired. You couldn't sneeze without your boss, your boss' boss, and his boss knowing about it. I went just a minute over on my lunch break, and I got a rather cold email about it. Don't worry so much, because for a few days, I accidentally went in ten minutes early and worked too much for the time I was reporting (I had a long commute and always overestimated the amount of time I needed. Also, SEPTA is horrible). But they saw I spent those minutes pissing away on the internet, so it all turned out well.
In short, don't mess with your time sheet. It's a dumb thing to do.
---
Why do people write 'your' instead of 'you're'? I've seen it more and more and, as a certified Grammar Nazi, it's starting to grind on me. I'm not above the occasional error myself (my talking grammar is downright atrocious), but I do try to make sure my audience can tell when I'm talking possessive and when I'm describing something of yours.
Simply put, saying, "your an idiot" will not sway me towards your point of view. "You're an idiot". Get it right.
Also, has 'lol' replaced the period? "your an idiot lol why cant u c that your an idiot lol?" is fairly typical of the internet these days, a fairly sad revelation. I used to defend the denizens of the internet against my snobby friends. I used to say, "Sure, a few folks talk like a drunken seal slapping a keyboard but most people write intelligently." Now, I feel silly and foolish.
But the absolute worst error trophy is held by the number substitutions. "got 2 go 2 8 sum dinner, bbl 4 u" Numbers have only one place, and that's to quantify something in simple digits (after all, writing VII or 'seven' to do multiplication is not easy and is quite painful and counter intuitive).
The only internet jargon I believe has any use is emoticons. They are quite handy in determining the attitude with which a given statement is being delivered. "You're such a fool :D" indicates friendly ribbing, while "You're such a fool" is an offensive impersonal accusation. Although, for some reason, I still have this mental image that emote use carries sarcastic connotations. Maybe it's because I have the arrogant assumption I can parse the 'air' of a conversation without being outright told, and maybe because I feel condescended to, as if I am a child who needs direction in the mannerisms of adults. Maybe I'm just stupid.
---
One of my real life friends was lambasted the other day by some elderly vet because she ran an American flag but not that black POW/MIA one. What a troop-hating unAmerican bitch. She was too flustered to offer much of a rebuttal and personally I'm too much of a coward to have said anything in her place.
But now I'm on the internet anonymous (more or less), so I'm saying I'd have told the twat to piss off. What, if I don't wear everything on my damn sleeve, then I must not support or agree with it? It's stupid, anyway. Why fly a flag for it? I assume no one is cackling with glee at the soldiers stuffed away in POW camps or Missing in Action (most of whom probably, sadly, deceased). I assume most Americans do carry sympathy for such soldiers and their families.
I don't need silly ribbons or flags to display how I feel. If you're so goddamn curious, then go ahead and ask. My house is not a battleship, I shouldn't have to rig a complex network of flags to tell the world everything about me.
And really, I think if you waste the time erecting a flagpole and flying the Stars and Stripes on it, you're probably as patriotic as they come. Especially since everyone I've spotted with flags always seem to keep them clean, do all the right flag protocol, etc. If they were heartless enemies of the state, I doubt they'd bother.
Also, I've never been quite sure, but does it cover all POWs/MIAs, or just American ones? Are the Iraqi and Afghanistan POWs allowed to rot just because they're our enemies and terrorists? Sure, if you accept the idea that our POW camps are ten times better than the homes we caught them in, with good food, water, and ninety channels of digital cable it might seem like a pretty good deal. But would you want to be locked up thousands of miles away from your family? Even if they lived in a shithole? I doubt it. For example, the Army barracks might be better in quality of life than the North Philadelphia slum you came from, but you still come home, don't you?
And that's assuming, of course, that the camps are as we're told they are. Chances are, they're probably pretty shitty. I suppose that's the cold reality of life, after all, they are trying to kill us. But the point remains: aren't they still POWs? I'm willing to bet most of them don't even give two figs about Al Qaeda or anything, they're just defending themselves against an invasion (both cultural and martial) in their homes. Extreme in their methods, perhaps, but so were the Bosnians when fighting against the Serbians, or the North against the South, or the British against the colonists (and vice versa for each of those cases).
Maybe I'm too naive.
---
I know it's just practice for the real world, but it always irks me when I have to write a paper on whatever lab for school. Why? Because inevitably it's just regurgitation of old news. I wrote a lab report on gel electrophoresis and using it to determine the specific sequence of a bacterial genome. Old news. When 'researching' it, I dredged up a billion papers from a million years ago on the thousands of ways to approach this method and so on. If I was inclined, I could have ripped them completely and handed them in as my paper.
My professors wouldn't notice, but they would still mark me down on their seemingly arbitrary standards. On one occasion, I had ten points off because my abstract (the quick run-down you see at the beginning of scientific papers) wasn't detailed enough. It was almost a thousand words. Any more, and it wouldn't be an abstract anymore, it might as well have been the paper itself.
Methods/Materials is another one they like to peg you on. The rule of thumb is that if it's taught on an undergrad level, you can safely generalize about it. For instance, I don't need to go into the details of how I prepared a sample for mass spectrometry (unless I had some brand new revolutionary method on it). I can just say I performed a mass spec. analysis and you can reasonably fill in the blank. But then, they tell me to put in such details so they know I know what I'm doing. When I do so, they mark off points because I didn't write with a scientific audience in mind.
My introductions and results/conclusions are flawless. Yet the stupid abstract and methods murder me.
Oh, and 'future' studies is also laughable. Yeah, what could I POSSIBLY do with this basic technique? How could I possibly expand upon it? I know! A ten second Google search could give me twenty answers because the technique or concept itself is so basic! Imagine learning the basics of a language, and then being asked 'What could you do in the future to expand your knowledge?' Er, Der, maybe try to hold conversations with those fluent in said language? Maybe visit that particular country? Maybe have your teacher move into the finer nuances of it? Or asking a builder in Second Life: "Now that you know how to resize a prim, what are some possible future investigations of this technique?" You'd laugh it off, that's what you'd do.
I figure if you have no clue, not even a semblance of how to take such a middle school level concept to the next level, you probably have no business taking that line of study. At least, not without some serious backbreaking and extremely painful work on your part.
---
As you might have guessed, my field is heavy into science. That's not saying much. I'm told it's a hard field, but personally I think anything can be hard if you don't have the right mind. For example, I cannot speak another language to save my life. Eight years of Spanish in High school and the best I can manage is asking how you are today and that the dog is very fat. Oh, and that the train is blue and grey. Linguistics is definitely not for me.
But, on my mother's side of the family, I'm going to be the first one in that family to get a college degree. And on my father's side, only the third (my father was a pharmacist, and his sister is a nurse). Pretty weighty! The result of this is that I am frequently poked into answering every single question about the universe.
Now, I do know a good deal of things. After all, you can't do what I do without knowing some basics. But asking me the details of astrophysics, I do not know. Or specifics in metallurgy. One person can only know so much. Ask me for the specific pathways for limb development, sure, but forget about the specific types of concrete.
Why? Because it isn't relevant, I guess. Concrete just don't factor much when you're investigating ACL tears. In fact, concrete is bad in such a scenario. Also, I haven't had much study into the specifics of concrete. It's an area outside my expertise. That's pretty important. You wouldn't ask your doctor to check out what's wrong with your sedan.
Which is why they always seem so disappointed when I tell them I don't know, and that I'd have to look it up. And then I feel bad because they feel let down. And then they feel bad that I feel bad because I feel I've let them down. A vicious cycle!
And then there's things no one knows. Why we age is something the world is constantly investigating over and over. And the reasons for it are very complex. No one quite understands. Which, by the way, is why it is heavy in research right now.
One final nail in the coffin is my reluctance to give an answer without checking my data three times over. I won't even give you an answer on the color of my hair without checking it in at least two mirrors and under different light conditions. Too cautious, perhaps, but it's helped immensely in the 'getting things right' category and helped me avoid the dreaded 'everything is totally wrong and I am so screwed'.
---
This blog was founded for two things. The first was to record the random acts of nonsense and writing that Jurin loves. It is certainly much handier to direct people to a simple website to read my crazy rather than getting me to log in and teleport over (at 4 AM Eastern time, I am more nasty and crabby than fun).
The other was to comment on just how crazy Linden Lab can be. Ok, well, more about Second Life in general, but Linden Lab is a big part of it. And I realize that I haven't been discussing them at all in the past few months. Maybe even half the year. I feel an explanation is owed.
I do not know what more to write about them. That is the simple truth. They are crazy and insane. Everyone hates their policies. Often, they bumble about and wreck things like a toddler who found his dad's gun and is now in a pottery shop with an angry bull. Sometimes they're right in whatever move they make. Sometimes they're wrong. And all too often, it is a rat race. After awhile, the feeling creeps into you that you have discussed this policy again, and again, and again, and the time is ripe to just let it die.
Take, for example, age verification. The whole deal with the 'Adult' rated parcels was beaten to death with the advent of age verification, which in turn was beaten to death with the banning of fake porn in that European country and its investigation into Second Life, which in turn was beaten to death with the first age players to settle on the grid. Since at least 2005 (2006 at the latest), we have been talking ourselves into circles!
And the reality is that some verification is required. Just like the sketchy videos on Youtube which ask if you're over 18 before it lets you view it. It's required in the sense of Linden Lab covering its ass. That's all there is, folks. The end.
The taking over of Xstreet is just but one episode of Linden Lab absorbing an existing institution in order to establish their own presence in that niche. This isn't news. And the endless discussions and debates about it have gone nowhere because everything to be said about it has been said more or less for the past four years.
That is why I stopped writing about Second Life, save for the occasional comment on blogs. I just don't feel there's a need to devote reams of useless nonsense, especially when what I say will likely be unoriginal and pointless.
Plus, the entire exercise is not dissimilar to shouting at the wind. Ari has often said that the Lab does listen, but frankly, I don't think so. They do what they want.
---
Why oh why is anyone surprised that SAT scores are still skewed? It's up there with the puzzlement people express towards Linden Labs. This is shown every year. Not like it matters anyway, because scores overall are trending down. At least, according to the article I read.
---
That's about all at the moment.
337
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Canary in the Coal Mine
Ah, Prokofy can add another notch to the 'U GONNA GIT BANN'D' belt.
I think it's unsettling to think that they're putting a knife to his throat on the objection to what he writes. Sure, he goes off like a bottle rocket sometimes over nonsense issues you or I could not care less about. On the whole, however, he does raise interesting points. Discussion would be poorer for lack of him.
Also, I regard him as a sort of 'test' of Linden Lab. Prok doesn't pull his punches but he's not outright flaming, either. He's that curious mix that you want to hate and report and shut up but hasn't ever actually done anything. He's a polarizer. If Second Life were Korea, he'd plant himself right up along the border and moon the North.
In short, he makes me feel safe. As long as LL tolerates him well enough, I can rant and rage on my own, smaller, scale and be immune from complete punishment! If he goes, what's to stop a small fry like me from being smeared across the floor?
I can only hope my active campaign of non-action in Second Life can protect me.
I think it's unsettling to think that they're putting a knife to his throat on the objection to what he writes. Sure, he goes off like a bottle rocket sometimes over nonsense issues you or I could not care less about. On the whole, however, he does raise interesting points. Discussion would be poorer for lack of him.
Also, I regard him as a sort of 'test' of Linden Lab. Prok doesn't pull his punches but he's not outright flaming, either. He's that curious mix that you want to hate and report and shut up but hasn't ever actually done anything. He's a polarizer. If Second Life were Korea, he'd plant himself right up along the border and moon the North.
In short, he makes me feel safe. As long as LL tolerates him well enough, I can rant and rage on my own, smaller, scale and be immune from complete punishment! If he goes, what's to stop a small fry like me from being smeared across the floor?
I can only hope my active campaign of non-action in Second Life can protect me.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Six Birthdays
This coming June, Second Life is going to be six years old. Just step and think about that. Six whole years of lag, naked noobies, and general insanity. It's the better part of a decade. Six years is longer than a single presidential term (in the United States, anyway). In fact, it's one and a half terms in office according to that metric.
We've seen a lot in those six years. Let's not get goofy, however, because comparisons between way back then and the right here and now have been done to death. "We didn't have skins, point to point teleporting, and we have to walk fifteen miles uphill both ways to reach the sandbox in order to build. Newbies these days don't have no idea how good they got it!" That's just way too easy.
The harder angle would be what's changed over this past year.
I think in terms of technical progress, nothing groundbreaking was unveiled. Nothing revolutionary was put to market. SL is still as laggy as it ever was and any significant changes towards stability have been lost on me (and, it seems, a good 60% of the rest of the population). For all of the opensourcing of the viewer, I haven't seen any high visible third party viewers, either. I still use the Nicholaz client, especially when the latest Linden experiment to 'lower' lag backfires.
The Lindens have exerted their significant muscle with more pressure than any other year. With the acquisition of XstreetSL and Onrez, they effectively circled the wagons with regards to the economy. Their fingers are in all the outlets. With the ramping of activity of the DPW moles and the creation of themed continents, competition is extending into the land itself. This wasn't simply an auction of the land, but the physical creation of an essential atmosphere. Granted, their attempts fell somewhat flat if you've seen Nautilus or Bay City these days. However, when they can't bootstrap, they glomp onto the next best thing. They went and tacked the United Sailing Sims (or whatever that USS acronym stood for) onto Nautilus and declared it 'good'.
We also witnessed Linden Lab making moves to control Second Life. For all their bluster about allowing the world to be free and easy, their actions have spoken otherwise. Not a few months ago, Jack Linden sat down and discussed bots and what to do about them. In addition, there's talk of moving against traffic fraud. Ad farms were finally flogged back around October or so of '08 with the caveat that ads without extortion are a-ok. They have a big stick and they're starting to play with it. It hasn't been pleasant all the way, either, because Openspaces and the move to treat them as regular sims on billing hurt. Hard.
Of course, the most notable example in these times has been the 'Adults Only' move. This was a resounding shot that yes, indeed, age verification is going to go ahead. The kinks have been worked out (you can use your credit card if you're disinclined to use your IDs) and full implementation is upon us. If you have adult content (specifically, adult content in the public domain and in public search), you must take it out of the limelight. Get your sex club offa our mainland! An option in the abuse report menu allows one to report the mislabeling of such content. The buzz word is 'predictability'. The Lindens are trying to force a Second Life experience that can be predictably controlled.
The outside venues of SL were revamped. The website and blogs got a much needed face lift, although the results are mixed. The new website has a pleasing design. The only gripe is the lack of ability to teleport to the locations and events featured on it. Same goes for the splash screen on the viewer log-in. I want to reach out and touch these places, but they're behind a glass wall. The new blog site is ok. All the categories have been butchered and you have to click around on everything to make sure you're really up to date on the latest comings and going of Linden Lab. Clunky, is the word, but not in the sense of being slow to load. Even the forums later got a good wash (I'm not a frequent visitor there, so I'm not sure how that change went).
And all the while the Second Life economy has... stalled. It hasn't continued its astronomical boon from 2007, but it hasn't completely went bust, either. It's doing what any other normal economy is doing, and that's existing. Doing its... economic thing. Stability, I think it's called. It's keeping in theme with the new mantra of SL: "predictability". It might be tougher to enter the market but once you're in you're alright. As long as you keep at. The moment you slip, the sharks'll get you.
Kendra Bancroft died. Lindens left. Sarah Nerd went out of business. Lots of churn. And yet life goes on. People flocked to some new worlds, and then came back. Lively came and died so fast heads twirled. Metaplace has come out, but I haven't visited it yet and I believe it's still in beta. Some of the bigger news blogs and agencies have pulled out as well. No one seems to notice or care. Unless it directly impacts them, no one stands up and shouts. They may glance up from their own personal blogs and put up a quick two paragraph eulogy. If that.
OpenSim has progressed, but not nearly as fast as initially anticipated. From the reports in '07 and '08, you'd think there would be a sim in every garage. The initial eureka moment over being able to host SL sims independent of LL's servers and reach led to all sorts of crazy reports. It reminds me of the predictions made in the '70s about life as it would be today. Astronomical imaginations of cities on the moon and flying cars gave way to reality: that stuff is hard! So it is with OpenSim. It's getting there. But that stuff is hard! And the big issues aren't really technical. Do I trust you with my log-in? With my copyrighted materials? That's funny.
We witnesses two major competitions: the Linden Prize and the Resident Choice Awards. The Linden prize was notable for being strictly inhouse and up to the judgement of the Lindens. You could sign up for a nomination, but they made the final judgement call. Upon seeing residents weren't keen on awards given without their input, the Resident choice awards were created and of course created whole new controversy. I could write volumes about it and it seems almost everyone had an opinion on it. Everyone seems to agree that something was not quite right about the entire thing. It felt shoddy to some.
And then there's me. This year will be my third in Second Life. Three entire years. Depending on who you ask, it's either a waste of time or a waste of energy. I kid. But I marvel at how I've seen a good half of Second Life's existence. At the people I've met, the friends I've made (and lost), the things I've seen and built, and all the things still left to see. Ah, I just can't wait until next year!
450
We've seen a lot in those six years. Let's not get goofy, however, because comparisons between way back then and the right here and now have been done to death. "We didn't have skins, point to point teleporting, and we have to walk fifteen miles uphill both ways to reach the sandbox in order to build. Newbies these days don't have no idea how good they got it!" That's just way too easy.
The harder angle would be what's changed over this past year.
I think in terms of technical progress, nothing groundbreaking was unveiled. Nothing revolutionary was put to market. SL is still as laggy as it ever was and any significant changes towards stability have been lost on me (and, it seems, a good 60% of the rest of the population). For all of the opensourcing of the viewer, I haven't seen any high visible third party viewers, either. I still use the Nicholaz client, especially when the latest Linden experiment to 'lower' lag backfires.
The Lindens have exerted their significant muscle with more pressure than any other year. With the acquisition of XstreetSL and Onrez, they effectively circled the wagons with regards to the economy. Their fingers are in all the outlets. With the ramping of activity of the DPW moles and the creation of themed continents, competition is extending into the land itself. This wasn't simply an auction of the land, but the physical creation of an essential atmosphere. Granted, their attempts fell somewhat flat if you've seen Nautilus or Bay City these days. However, when they can't bootstrap, they glomp onto the next best thing. They went and tacked the United Sailing Sims (or whatever that USS acronym stood for) onto Nautilus and declared it 'good'.
We also witnessed Linden Lab making moves to control Second Life. For all their bluster about allowing the world to be free and easy, their actions have spoken otherwise. Not a few months ago, Jack Linden sat down and discussed bots and what to do about them. In addition, there's talk of moving against traffic fraud. Ad farms were finally flogged back around October or so of '08 with the caveat that ads without extortion are a-ok. They have a big stick and they're starting to play with it. It hasn't been pleasant all the way, either, because Openspaces and the move to treat them as regular sims on billing hurt. Hard.
Of course, the most notable example in these times has been the 'Adults Only' move. This was a resounding shot that yes, indeed, age verification is going to go ahead. The kinks have been worked out (you can use your credit card if you're disinclined to use your IDs) and full implementation is upon us. If you have adult content (specifically, adult content in the public domain and in public search), you must take it out of the limelight. Get your sex club offa our mainland! An option in the abuse report menu allows one to report the mislabeling of such content. The buzz word is 'predictability'. The Lindens are trying to force a Second Life experience that can be predictably controlled.
The outside venues of SL were revamped. The website and blogs got a much needed face lift, although the results are mixed. The new website has a pleasing design. The only gripe is the lack of ability to teleport to the locations and events featured on it. Same goes for the splash screen on the viewer log-in. I want to reach out and touch these places, but they're behind a glass wall. The new blog site is ok. All the categories have been butchered and you have to click around on everything to make sure you're really up to date on the latest comings and going of Linden Lab. Clunky, is the word, but not in the sense of being slow to load. Even the forums later got a good wash (I'm not a frequent visitor there, so I'm not sure how that change went).
And all the while the Second Life economy has... stalled. It hasn't continued its astronomical boon from 2007, but it hasn't completely went bust, either. It's doing what any other normal economy is doing, and that's existing. Doing its... economic thing. Stability, I think it's called. It's keeping in theme with the new mantra of SL: "predictability". It might be tougher to enter the market but once you're in you're alright. As long as you keep at. The moment you slip, the sharks'll get you.
Kendra Bancroft died. Lindens left. Sarah Nerd went out of business. Lots of churn. And yet life goes on. People flocked to some new worlds, and then came back. Lively came and died so fast heads twirled. Metaplace has come out, but I haven't visited it yet and I believe it's still in beta. Some of the bigger news blogs and agencies have pulled out as well. No one seems to notice or care. Unless it directly impacts them, no one stands up and shouts. They may glance up from their own personal blogs and put up a quick two paragraph eulogy. If that.
OpenSim has progressed, but not nearly as fast as initially anticipated. From the reports in '07 and '08, you'd think there would be a sim in every garage. The initial eureka moment over being able to host SL sims independent of LL's servers and reach led to all sorts of crazy reports. It reminds me of the predictions made in the '70s about life as it would be today. Astronomical imaginations of cities on the moon and flying cars gave way to reality: that stuff is hard! So it is with OpenSim. It's getting there. But that stuff is hard! And the big issues aren't really technical. Do I trust you with my log-in? With my copyrighted materials? That's funny.
We witnesses two major competitions: the Linden Prize and the Resident Choice Awards. The Linden prize was notable for being strictly inhouse and up to the judgement of the Lindens. You could sign up for a nomination, but they made the final judgement call. Upon seeing residents weren't keen on awards given without their input, the Resident choice awards were created and of course created whole new controversy. I could write volumes about it and it seems almost everyone had an opinion on it. Everyone seems to agree that something was not quite right about the entire thing. It felt shoddy to some.
And then there's me. This year will be my third in Second Life. Three entire years. Depending on who you ask, it's either a waste of time or a waste of energy. I kid. But I marvel at how I've seen a good half of Second Life's existence. At the people I've met, the friends I've made (and lost), the things I've seen and built, and all the things still left to see. Ah, I just can't wait until next year!
450
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
On Partings
So, My Dear Friends, we have arrived at the end of another April. Winter has left and Spring is in! And as winter goes, so go many other things.
Lots of news agencies. Goodbye SLNN and Reuters and all those others who found out too late that Second Life is about a different kind of story. Or perhaps just not interested. To them our bickering were like the mews and howls of Centralia, PA. Interesting and strange to those big guys in New York or LA, but dull after many tellings. Seriously guys, we get it. Your entire town is rotting underground from massive coal fires. Move on already! Did you hear about swine flu and Obama's visit to where ever he was? Now that's news.
Not to mention that grabbing an audience is difficult. Choosing to run a news blog outside of Second Life is an uphill battle. Massive advertising is required to get attention inworld, and heaven help you if you don't keep your hands on the pulse and fail to update often. Or if you miss a big story. Or neglect to report one. Or neglect to go outside of 'looking up LL's blog'.
Running a newspaper inside of SL is as difficult. You get all the burden of collecting and editing stories with the challenge of cramming it into a notecard or prim book. The prim book may or may not rezz. People won't wait the two or three minutes for the pretty pictures to load completely. Large notecards (and large they will become if they are truly reporting Second Life) also are a pain to deal with. Once again, attention has to be earned and getting paid is one of those luxuries up there with my desire to own a house on the shore. Not having income kills everything dead fast.
I mentioned before that looking at a map of the grid is akin to watching the stars at night. Thousands upon thousands of islands dot the scape. If each of those had only one avatar that regularly logged on and used them, that's thousands and thousands of avatars. Each with their own little cliques and circles. Some stories may unify them all (such as banks buckling under or the openspace debacle) but each has their own story to tell and stories that they alone are interested in.
A metro area divides up into towns and cities around the center city. A city divides up into neighborhoods. Neighborhoods divide up into blocks. Each has their own cares and worries. That's why the Inquirer has special sections for Jersey and Delaware and the suburbs. It brings relevant news to its target demographic. Attempting to do the same in Second Life is a time consuming, if nigh impossible, task. Furries and War sims are two that come to mind (and indeed, were often highlighted in the former SL Herald). There's all manner of roleplay communities. There's the sailing sims. The art community. The devotees of Nunchuck. SL Pride. And so on. What a hassle to organize all that and the hottest stories off the Lindens and general community on top of that! And why bother going to a news source for that when you can easily gossip with the neighbors (after all, how big are some of these communities? probably not large enough to not notice what their left hand is doing) and check the Linden's own blog for news. Why bother?
Goodbye, dear news agencies.
Ginsu Linden left, and Robin Linden left just this February. That's the last of the Ancient Elders (the founding Lindens from before 2005 or so) and most of the current cast are the new guys like M. I find it interesting that I've been in Second Life longer than most, if not all, of the current Linden Lab staff. These new Lindens are forging their own path and forging their own new Second Life.
Anytime you shake up the management, the outcome results in changes. Lincoln's election resulted in a civil war and civil rights (at least, right to not be enslaved). Steve Jobs electrified Apple. My own university's late president, upon taking up his position as president, transformed our poor school from 'that ugly orange brick blot north of Market street' into an increasingly awesome college (albeit still ugliest in the universe, alas, some things never change). And with his own passing (ah, yes, my university's president, another victim of April), that ugly orange brick blot is going to take another turn. Hopefully for the better, as I'd prefer my degree to flow from an actual existing institution. Embarrassment would abound to explain how it came from an extinct and dead school.
Ginsu left, Robin left, Philip left. Torley's still around but he hasn't really been in the forefront for some time and is probably quietly churning out tutorials. Didn't he used to be a very public face to LL? I miss those days. Torley, for all his faults, presented a sappy happy image of LL and SL in general. And now? More or less invisible. There's Blue, too. He's around and ... um... doing things. I never really looked too close at what Blue does. He always seems to be around, though. A case of a Jack of all Trades. One of those Liaison style Lindens. Gosh, there were a million of those.
Also, you could argue that Philip is still around, just leveled up. The personal touch is gone. When he was CEO, he was THE guy in CHARGE. He seemed to have a bigger impact and greater direct control over things. And personable to boot. For as often as people would gripe about the direction of SL and blame Philip for everything, no one really hated him. Now... we have M. Like a minted officer out of MI6, M gives me this feeling of being more than he pretends to be. Oh, there's the funny 'diary entries' and 'fireside chats' about the brave new world he has had placed upon his shoulders and his follies with having a box stuck on his avatar's head, but it seems forced to me. I suppose he's a better politician.
And Robin? Hell if I know her direct replacement. Ginsu, too. I think that's another thing that's leaving with them. Recognition. Robin and Phil used to come in and greet us mere mortals, and in doing so grew a special kind of fondness from the populace. The new guys? Well, they do have their office hours, but those are supposed to be official business. Those get derailed, too, and hijacked by someone or other into some inane unrelated topic. And you only get a solid hour with the Linden in question, sometimes only that solid hour for the entire week. That special Aura is gone.
Add in that in our ever growing world, where the vast vast majority will never ever see a Linden ever, and the Lindens have pretty much become 'Those Guys'. You know, the guys at work who are really high above you on the hierarchy. You never ever see them but you do get emails from them and always with that faux kindness to a message laced with urgency or doom or something serious. That's the Lindens these days. Not an integral part of our world, but bigwigs far removed from us.
They are different from us. They are not like us.
Goodbye, dear Ginsu. And the Lindens who left before you.
Adult content is being herded off into a super special awesome Adult Only continent. It's official. You can read it on the main blog. If you have adult rated and adult themed (I like the 'adult' euphemism, by the way, I wonder if other adult things like the military sims or big business headquarters will have to move) then you better have the wagons packed and ready to roll. March off into your ghettos! This is SL, so do it with a smile. Take your sex and drugs off our grid, off this brave new world of ours.
And you'll be blinded out, too. Unless someone is age verified and has adult content enabled on search, the citizens of the main grid won't be able to find you. Given the previous verification fiasco, not too many people will be keen to register and have their hand stamped. In fact, given the only reason to do so will be to access adult content I can imagine it to become a stigma of sorts, similar to someone purchasing Viagra. Sure, it's for your pulmonary hypertension! We all know what kind of tension you're relieving, wink wink.
With this enforcement, we also enforce fraud. Heaven help you if you mismark your parcel, for you will be reported and action will be taken. There's a reason it's called a reservation. I can easily imagine LL stripping the offending content off your parcel if they find it misflagged. It might end up being abused by the vengeful like any other bannable reportable offense that's been implemented since the dawn of time. And what about the home? People tend to place home to have sex in them. If 'Mature' is a code word for 'PG sim with cursing allowed and nothing else', then by definition such homes will have to be 'Adult' rated.
In a way, I can't wait to see the result. Will there be a mass exodus, leaving LL holding the tattered remains of the original mainland continents, the tattered PG/Mature remains of ad farms, mini malls, and Mole roads (remember that Landlords will have to move if their renters are partaking in activities of the night)? The occasional art gallery will thrown in there too somewhere, I suppose. It seems such a case will result in the life of the grid moving off center stage behind the wings.
Imagine the seedy gritty underworld of the adult themed Second Life. A virtual Big Easy where anything goes! No worries about offending some silly age player or RL teen cause we're all over 18 here! People might register as Adult Only just to be free of the Disney-esque restrictions being imposed on the mainland. What would you report them for, labeling their land too high? Are you going to set up some third party regulatory body that will label each parcel without the owner's consent, like the movie ratings in real life? Because the main grid will indeed become like Disney land, full of art galleries and infohubs and fancy builds put up by whoever. Completely vanilla.
Considering the speculation that LL is merging in the teen grid (a useless gesture considering that de facto teens can register on SL merely by lying on a few of the sign-up questions for a freebie account alone), the old mainland will become Teen Grid 2.0. You know, earlier I stated that stigma may accompany those who verify, but perhaps the opposite will be true. Perhaps not verifying will label you as a stupid teen or kid. In any event, I can easily imagine the new adult continent as the most lively of the two partitions of the main grid if only because, and let's be honest with ourselves, a good majority are in Second Life for the mature content. Whether it's empty sex or a desire to find someone, the right one, fancy builds and nifty contests and events are more or less secondary to that. Maybe even integrated with it, a good date might be to a live concert.
Eventually, Linden Lab will crack down on the new continent. Teens will get verification through their parents, they can already get their parents to sign up and pay for game like World of Warcraft, and the Lindens will have to move to prevent the children from accessing adult content again. The true end will occur when OpenSims takes off and allows everyone to build their own grid. This world of ours will shatter into isolated universes that in all likelihood will be forever cut off from each other. There could be a 'wood between the worlds' concept a la Naria, but you'd run into the adult/teen demon again, because Linden Lab would have to monitor the gates to the Adult worlds and frankly why bother? It could end up as nothing more than a phone book, where you can look up which grid is what. That way, LL is not responsible for anything except the server code and their own Disney world, if they can manage to hold onto that. Can you imagine LL publishing a metaversal yellow pages?
Goodbye, dear Adult Content.
The Lindens themselves put up a Memorial garden for everyone who died in RL or just decided to get out of Dodge City. As I said a few days ago, it's kind of tasteful, if a bit bare and focused on a few. This was set up last year in April and now it's back again, as if the Lindens too realize that April is a cruel month. I think there's more to mourn than just those of our friends who have left and never returned.
And yet, onward we march.
Let's hope the lilacs of Second Life bred this April are beautiful.
Lots of news agencies. Goodbye SLNN and Reuters and all those others who found out too late that Second Life is about a different kind of story. Or perhaps just not interested. To them our bickering were like the mews and howls of Centralia, PA. Interesting and strange to those big guys in New York or LA, but dull after many tellings. Seriously guys, we get it. Your entire town is rotting underground from massive coal fires. Move on already! Did you hear about swine flu and Obama's visit to where ever he was? Now that's news.
Not to mention that grabbing an audience is difficult. Choosing to run a news blog outside of Second Life is an uphill battle. Massive advertising is required to get attention inworld, and heaven help you if you don't keep your hands on the pulse and fail to update often. Or if you miss a big story. Or neglect to report one. Or neglect to go outside of 'looking up LL's blog'.
Running a newspaper inside of SL is as difficult. You get all the burden of collecting and editing stories with the challenge of cramming it into a notecard or prim book. The prim book may or may not rezz. People won't wait the two or three minutes for the pretty pictures to load completely. Large notecards (and large they will become if they are truly reporting Second Life) also are a pain to deal with. Once again, attention has to be earned and getting paid is one of those luxuries up there with my desire to own a house on the shore. Not having income kills everything dead fast.
I mentioned before that looking at a map of the grid is akin to watching the stars at night. Thousands upon thousands of islands dot the scape. If each of those had only one avatar that regularly logged on and used them, that's thousands and thousands of avatars. Each with their own little cliques and circles. Some stories may unify them all (such as banks buckling under or the openspace debacle) but each has their own story to tell and stories that they alone are interested in.
A metro area divides up into towns and cities around the center city. A city divides up into neighborhoods. Neighborhoods divide up into blocks. Each has their own cares and worries. That's why the Inquirer has special sections for Jersey and Delaware and the suburbs. It brings relevant news to its target demographic. Attempting to do the same in Second Life is a time consuming, if nigh impossible, task. Furries and War sims are two that come to mind (and indeed, were often highlighted in the former SL Herald). There's all manner of roleplay communities. There's the sailing sims. The art community. The devotees of Nunchuck. SL Pride. And so on. What a hassle to organize all that and the hottest stories off the Lindens and general community on top of that! And why bother going to a news source for that when you can easily gossip with the neighbors (after all, how big are some of these communities? probably not large enough to not notice what their left hand is doing) and check the Linden's own blog for news. Why bother?
Goodbye, dear news agencies.
Ginsu Linden left, and Robin Linden left just this February. That's the last of the Ancient Elders (the founding Lindens from before 2005 or so) and most of the current cast are the new guys like M. I find it interesting that I've been in Second Life longer than most, if not all, of the current Linden Lab staff. These new Lindens are forging their own path and forging their own new Second Life.
Anytime you shake up the management, the outcome results in changes. Lincoln's election resulted in a civil war and civil rights (at least, right to not be enslaved). Steve Jobs electrified Apple. My own university's late president, upon taking up his position as president, transformed our poor school from 'that ugly orange brick blot north of Market street' into an increasingly awesome college (albeit still ugliest in the universe, alas, some things never change). And with his own passing (ah, yes, my university's president, another victim of April), that ugly orange brick blot is going to take another turn. Hopefully for the better, as I'd prefer my degree to flow from an actual existing institution. Embarrassment would abound to explain how it came from an extinct and dead school.
Ginsu left, Robin left, Philip left. Torley's still around but he hasn't really been in the forefront for some time and is probably quietly churning out tutorials. Didn't he used to be a very public face to LL? I miss those days. Torley, for all his faults, presented a sappy happy image of LL and SL in general. And now? More or less invisible. There's Blue, too. He's around and ... um... doing things. I never really looked too close at what Blue does. He always seems to be around, though. A case of a Jack of all Trades. One of those Liaison style Lindens. Gosh, there were a million of those.
Also, you could argue that Philip is still around, just leveled up. The personal touch is gone. When he was CEO, he was THE guy in CHARGE. He seemed to have a bigger impact and greater direct control over things. And personable to boot. For as often as people would gripe about the direction of SL and blame Philip for everything, no one really hated him. Now... we have M. Like a minted officer out of MI6, M gives me this feeling of being more than he pretends to be. Oh, there's the funny 'diary entries' and 'fireside chats' about the brave new world he has had placed upon his shoulders and his follies with having a box stuck on his avatar's head, but it seems forced to me. I suppose he's a better politician.
And Robin? Hell if I know her direct replacement. Ginsu, too. I think that's another thing that's leaving with them. Recognition. Robin and Phil used to come in and greet us mere mortals, and in doing so grew a special kind of fondness from the populace. The new guys? Well, they do have their office hours, but those are supposed to be official business. Those get derailed, too, and hijacked by someone or other into some inane unrelated topic. And you only get a solid hour with the Linden in question, sometimes only that solid hour for the entire week. That special Aura is gone.
Add in that in our ever growing world, where the vast vast majority will never ever see a Linden ever, and the Lindens have pretty much become 'Those Guys'. You know, the guys at work who are really high above you on the hierarchy. You never ever see them but you do get emails from them and always with that faux kindness to a message laced with urgency or doom or something serious. That's the Lindens these days. Not an integral part of our world, but bigwigs far removed from us.
They are different from us. They are not like us.
Goodbye, dear Ginsu. And the Lindens who left before you.
Adult content is being herded off into a super special awesome Adult Only continent. It's official. You can read it on the main blog. If you have adult rated and adult themed (I like the 'adult' euphemism, by the way, I wonder if other adult things like the military sims or big business headquarters will have to move) then you better have the wagons packed and ready to roll. March off into your ghettos! This is SL, so do it with a smile. Take your sex and drugs off our grid, off this brave new world of ours.
And you'll be blinded out, too. Unless someone is age verified and has adult content enabled on search, the citizens of the main grid won't be able to find you. Given the previous verification fiasco, not too many people will be keen to register and have their hand stamped. In fact, given the only reason to do so will be to access adult content I can imagine it to become a stigma of sorts, similar to someone purchasing Viagra. Sure, it's for your pulmonary hypertension! We all know what kind of tension you're relieving, wink wink.
With this enforcement, we also enforce fraud. Heaven help you if you mismark your parcel, for you will be reported and action will be taken. There's a reason it's called a reservation. I can easily imagine LL stripping the offending content off your parcel if they find it misflagged. It might end up being abused by the vengeful like any other bannable reportable offense that's been implemented since the dawn of time. And what about the home? People tend to place home to have sex in them. If 'Mature' is a code word for 'PG sim with cursing allowed and nothing else', then by definition such homes will have to be 'Adult' rated.
In a way, I can't wait to see the result. Will there be a mass exodus, leaving LL holding the tattered remains of the original mainland continents, the tattered PG/Mature remains of ad farms, mini malls, and Mole roads (remember that Landlords will have to move if their renters are partaking in activities of the night)? The occasional art gallery will thrown in there too somewhere, I suppose. It seems such a case will result in the life of the grid moving off center stage behind the wings.
Imagine the seedy gritty underworld of the adult themed Second Life. A virtual Big Easy where anything goes! No worries about offending some silly age player or RL teen cause we're all over 18 here! People might register as Adult Only just to be free of the Disney-esque restrictions being imposed on the mainland. What would you report them for, labeling their land too high? Are you going to set up some third party regulatory body that will label each parcel without the owner's consent, like the movie ratings in real life? Because the main grid will indeed become like Disney land, full of art galleries and infohubs and fancy builds put up by whoever. Completely vanilla.
Considering the speculation that LL is merging in the teen grid (a useless gesture considering that de facto teens can register on SL merely by lying on a few of the sign-up questions for a freebie account alone), the old mainland will become Teen Grid 2.0. You know, earlier I stated that stigma may accompany those who verify, but perhaps the opposite will be true. Perhaps not verifying will label you as a stupid teen or kid. In any event, I can easily imagine the new adult continent as the most lively of the two partitions of the main grid if only because, and let's be honest with ourselves, a good majority are in Second Life for the mature content. Whether it's empty sex or a desire to find someone, the right one, fancy builds and nifty contests and events are more or less secondary to that. Maybe even integrated with it, a good date might be to a live concert.
Eventually, Linden Lab will crack down on the new continent. Teens will get verification through their parents, they can already get their parents to sign up and pay for game like World of Warcraft, and the Lindens will have to move to prevent the children from accessing adult content again. The true end will occur when OpenSims takes off and allows everyone to build their own grid. This world of ours will shatter into isolated universes that in all likelihood will be forever cut off from each other. There could be a 'wood between the worlds' concept a la Naria, but you'd run into the adult/teen demon again, because Linden Lab would have to monitor the gates to the Adult worlds and frankly why bother? It could end up as nothing more than a phone book, where you can look up which grid is what. That way, LL is not responsible for anything except the server code and their own Disney world, if they can manage to hold onto that. Can you imagine LL publishing a metaversal yellow pages?
Goodbye, dear Adult Content.
The Lindens themselves put up a Memorial garden for everyone who died in RL or just decided to get out of Dodge City. As I said a few days ago, it's kind of tasteful, if a bit bare and focused on a few. This was set up last year in April and now it's back again, as if the Lindens too realize that April is a cruel month. I think there's more to mourn than just those of our friends who have left and never returned.
And yet, onward we march.
| APRIL is the cruellest month, breeding | |
| Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing | |
| Memory and desire, stirring | |
| Dull roots with spring rain. |
Let's hope the lilacs of Second Life bred this April are beautiful.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
On Resident's Choice Awards Voting
The voting has been up for the resident's choice awards for some time now, and I must say that it's immense fun. In fact, it's a bit more open than I imagined it would be.
The first step is to list your language, country, and Second Life name. No logging in necessary, I wonder, however, if you can spoof another person's name. There doesn't seem to be a system to distinguish whether the real Anna Tsiolkovsky is voting. The page stipulates that you can only vote once which raises some questions as to what the Lab will do if an avatar suddenly exhibits multiple personality disorder.
On another note, how does language and nation determine 'winners that represent the opinions of each community'? Are we going to get specific winners in each language and nation? Why the hell should the vote be influenced in any way by nationality and language? The only influence should be the language in which the questions are presented. Does this imply that some weighting system to adjust the ballots? Does a Brazilian's vote get less weight than a Canadian's? Someone please enlighten me, perhaps a mental block is preventing me or encumbering me here.
There's about forty questions, and after the initial round of 'favorite place to hang out', 'favorite gallery', and so on, we get strange and rather specific ones. Like 'favorite place to Victorianize and get Steam Punky'. I've only met one person, actually two maybe, who was into that scene. Favorite place to get my AO on and Be Tiny? Robot Rebellion? What? Awfully detailed, aren't we? Why isn't there a 'favorite place to be a caveman' or 'favorite place to be a mole' or 'favorite place to form an angry mob against the Lindens'?
It goes on:
Favorite place to be emo or be goth, guys! Post Apocalypse! I should have campaigned for 'favorite flower garden'. I like gardens. Or 'favorite place to fall asleep', I don't recall that being in there.
I do like the open space with which to vote. There's no hindrance on selecting from a chosen few, although the Lindens have certainly already singled some people out in secret. My problem, and this is specific to me and not likely you, is that I didn't think to get my list of landmarks and places and names out beforehand so many of my entries were very spur of the moment and horribly misspelled. Like Tsiolkovksy, that's always a tricky one to spell. I just used a different arrangement each time, so I had "Anna Tsiolkovky", "Anna Tsolkovsky", "Anna Tsilkovsky", "Anna Tsiolkovski" and so on.
As for places, it seems you need to know the slurls and I was completely lost. I did this around 1 AM and I was not in the mood to dig through everything. So to everyone whose sims I voted for, I apologise in advance as my vote for you is likely to be thrown out. And of course, I screwed up sim and parcel names, too. I realized the next day (after a very good sleep) that it's Blackwater and not Blackwood. Damn!
The results are to be released on the 17th this April and I am excited to see what the English United States of American voters opinioned as representing the best in our community.
Bonus Content: Check out what spellcheck says is the correct spelling of my name:
The first step is to list your language, country, and Second Life name. No logging in necessary, I wonder, however, if you can spoof another person's name. There doesn't seem to be a system to distinguish whether the real Anna Tsiolkovsky is voting. The page stipulates that you can only vote once which raises some questions as to what the Lab will do if an avatar suddenly exhibits multiple personality disorder.
On another note, how does language and nation determine 'winners that represent the opinions of each community'? Are we going to get specific winners in each language and nation? Why the hell should the vote be influenced in any way by nationality and language? The only influence should be the language in which the questions are presented. Does this imply that some weighting system to adjust the ballots? Does a Brazilian's vote get less weight than a Canadian's? Someone please enlighten me, perhaps a mental block is preventing me or encumbering me here.
There's about forty questions, and after the initial round of 'favorite place to hang out', 'favorite gallery', and so on, we get strange and rather specific ones. Like 'favorite place to Victorianize and get Steam Punky'. I've only met one person, actually two maybe, who was into that scene. Favorite place to get my AO on and Be Tiny? Robot Rebellion? What? Awfully detailed, aren't we? Why isn't there a 'favorite place to be a caveman' or 'favorite place to be a mole' or 'favorite place to form an angry mob against the Lindens'?
It goes on:
Favorite place to be emo or be goth, guys! Post Apocalypse! I should have campaigned for 'favorite flower garden'. I like gardens. Or 'favorite place to fall asleep', I don't recall that being in there.
I do like the open space with which to vote. There's no hindrance on selecting from a chosen few, although the Lindens have certainly already singled some people out in secret. My problem, and this is specific to me and not likely you, is that I didn't think to get my list of landmarks and places and names out beforehand so many of my entries were very spur of the moment and horribly misspelled. Like Tsiolkovksy, that's always a tricky one to spell. I just used a different arrangement each time, so I had "Anna Tsiolkovky", "Anna Tsolkovsky", "Anna Tsilkovsky", "Anna Tsiolkovski" and so on.
As for places, it seems you need to know the slurls and I was completely lost. I did this around 1 AM and I was not in the mood to dig through everything. So to everyone whose sims I voted for, I apologise in advance as my vote for you is likely to be thrown out. And of course, I screwed up sim and parcel names, too. I realized the next day (after a very good sleep) that it's Blackwater and not Blackwood. Damn!
The results are to be released on the 17th this April and I am excited to see what the English United States of American voters opinioned as representing the best in our community.
Bonus Content: Check out what spellcheck says is the correct spelling of my name:
On Walled Gardens
For April Fool's, while some were making drama of leaving, M Linden decided it would be an ideal time to declare that new Second Life servers would be available! This was no surprise to anyone. Linden Lab regularly prints out land and rolls it out like wet toilet paper.
But lo! Look closer, my friends! As it turns out, these new servers would have the option of being completely walled off from the main grid! Yes, you will be able to run a server all of your own that does not have to deal with the main grid and all its woes. No more worrying about newbies crashing in or griefers parading around. Your little patch of land will be isolated from it all. I imagine it something like Dinotopia or Atlantis, where life goes on despite being completely isolated from the rest of the planet.
This is quite an ideal solution for colleges. They'd no longer have to deal with Second Life's troubles and nasty residents. They can do their own thing off the grid where no one can touch them. They can set up their chemistry models and displays of all kinds with no interference. Which is a good thing, I think, because honestly that's the way it is now. Most colleges have their islands isolated to their group which you need permission to join. And you can only join if you are a registered student (or special visitor). I'm not sure, but likely they won't have to deal with the downtimes either, or when the grid decides to play dead.
Businesses can use Second Life as a glorified office meeting. I know in the past that a few of them attempted to create an ad of sorts out of their island, but each them it didn't seem to pan out. Either they would have a barebones display of posters on plywood panels or a few random activities such as rollerboarding or dunk the avatar. I know I still have my cement star from AOL island's Walk of the Stars, with my handprint and name on it (my name got the shaft, however, as Tsiolkovsky was too long for the imprinting script). Both of those options fizzled, but the allure of holding an office meeting, where you can see another person face to avatar (the idea is that you'd make your avatar look like you) and be able to show off some concept in a 3D space as a prototype (even if only as a show) was and apparently still is strong. Or so Linden lab says.
Probably more but I'm too lazy to think or remember them.
So we appease those two markets. Linden Lab survives another day! Hail the conquering heroes! Corporations and Universities get their wish of not having to deal with us proles, and us proles no longer have to deal with lame islands and the constant whine of a community that is closed and too adult and 'losers who need first lives hur hur'.
Let's look farther, though. How will Linden Lab give out these islands? Do I have to be an official University or Corporation? Will the Tsiolkovsky Industrial Co. be granted the go-ahead? Or what if Linden Lab lets any old avatar buy one?
I think people would jump for them. Think of it: you and a select group of friends would have your own private sandbox to build or do the nasty in without all the world gazing in on you. It is basically the same attraction as the big businesses, except on a much smaller scale. You would have the weight of Linden Lab's power upon you to keep separate from that yucky ol' main grid with its dirty newbies and icky griefers.
The problem would lie in the cost. As some have already pointed out, to take possibly take advantage of this fat cash calf, Linden Lab would jack the price up fairly high. It's reasonable, they are arranging a server tailor made to you and made separate from their entire world. And for deeper reasons, they don't want everyone to rush in and have the grid end up a billion isolated islands, like small planets in a giant universe. At least, not yet, anyway.
So, would those people buy such a thing? Would they value their privacy and pixel sex enough to buy the special SL GRID super special awesome separate island?
We do see that they (they being everyone who participates in the act of pixual intercourse) will pay good sums for good prim genitals, and good homes and beds in which they can perform. And security orbs to make sure people stay off their lawn even if alt zoom renders that moot. They went and bought lots of those Openspaces as a cheap way to set up. They still pay good money for an island to fortify.
I'm being a prude. I'm sure the idea that you could have a private off-grid island is appealing to some. I can see people joining together to pay the support and tier for it, they already do this with regular islands and groups. In theory, this should be a good match.
But the one thing that I think shoots down that theory is that with the current tools, all this can be effectively done. Islands usually aren't joined unless a special order is put out, and putting up ban lines and access lists takes care of unwanted interlopers. And for far far less cash. The sole benefit is the (still undefined and rumored) separation, in total, from the main grid. Which leads us to ask: how deep is that separation? The best would be a complete break from the central grid and its rolling restarts and crashes and such. I think M says as much.
Aside from the rolling restarts, has the grid completely failed lately? I can't recall it doing so recently although I will admit to have a lacking presence in Second Life lately.
The cost, that's the rub. I doubt it will be cheap. It will likely be very expensive. We don't know yet because M loves a good cliffhanger and promises to tell us 'this summer' which narrows it down to June through August. July? Until we know the details, we can only know that it will be completely separated from the grid and it's implied it will be expensive. It's targeted specifically towards big business and universities (although Openspace was supposed to target island owners who wanted to pretty their islands and we saw how that turned out). And it will have a beta phase, as M mentions an offer to apply to test the beta stage.
Oh, I just can't wait!
But lo! Look closer, my friends! As it turns out, these new servers would have the option of being completely walled off from the main grid! Yes, you will be able to run a server all of your own that does not have to deal with the main grid and all its woes. No more worrying about newbies crashing in or griefers parading around. Your little patch of land will be isolated from it all. I imagine it something like Dinotopia or Atlantis, where life goes on despite being completely isolated from the rest of the planet.
This is quite an ideal solution for colleges. They'd no longer have to deal with Second Life's troubles and nasty residents. They can do their own thing off the grid where no one can touch them. They can set up their chemistry models and displays of all kinds with no interference. Which is a good thing, I think, because honestly that's the way it is now. Most colleges have their islands isolated to their group which you need permission to join. And you can only join if you are a registered student (or special visitor). I'm not sure, but likely they won't have to deal with the downtimes either, or when the grid decides to play dead.
Businesses can use Second Life as a glorified office meeting. I know in the past that a few of them attempted to create an ad of sorts out of their island, but each them it didn't seem to pan out. Either they would have a barebones display of posters on plywood panels or a few random activities such as rollerboarding or dunk the avatar. I know I still have my cement star from AOL island's Walk of the Stars, with my handprint and name on it (my name got the shaft, however, as Tsiolkovsky was too long for the imprinting script). Both of those options fizzled, but the allure of holding an office meeting, where you can see another person face to avatar (the idea is that you'd make your avatar look like you) and be able to show off some concept in a 3D space as a prototype (even if only as a show) was and apparently still is strong. Or so Linden lab says.
Probably more but I'm too lazy to think or remember them.
So we appease those two markets. Linden Lab survives another day! Hail the conquering heroes! Corporations and Universities get their wish of not having to deal with us proles, and us proles no longer have to deal with lame islands and the constant whine of a community that is closed and too adult and 'losers who need first lives hur hur'.
Let's look farther, though. How will Linden Lab give out these islands? Do I have to be an official University or Corporation? Will the Tsiolkovsky Industrial Co. be granted the go-ahead? Or what if Linden Lab lets any old avatar buy one?
I think people would jump for them. Think of it: you and a select group of friends would have your own private sandbox to build or do the nasty in without all the world gazing in on you. It is basically the same attraction as the big businesses, except on a much smaller scale. You would have the weight of Linden Lab's power upon you to keep separate from that yucky ol' main grid with its dirty newbies and icky griefers.
The problem would lie in the cost. As some have already pointed out, to take possibly take advantage of this fat cash calf, Linden Lab would jack the price up fairly high. It's reasonable, they are arranging a server tailor made to you and made separate from their entire world. And for deeper reasons, they don't want everyone to rush in and have the grid end up a billion isolated islands, like small planets in a giant universe. At least, not yet, anyway.
So, would those people buy such a thing? Would they value their privacy and pixel sex enough to buy the special SL GRID super special awesome separate island?
We do see that they (they being everyone who participates in the act of pixual intercourse) will pay good sums for good prim genitals, and good homes and beds in which they can perform. And security orbs to make sure people stay off their lawn even if alt zoom renders that moot. They went and bought lots of those Openspaces as a cheap way to set up. They still pay good money for an island to fortify.
I'm being a prude. I'm sure the idea that you could have a private off-grid island is appealing to some. I can see people joining together to pay the support and tier for it, they already do this with regular islands and groups. In theory, this should be a good match.
But the one thing that I think shoots down that theory is that with the current tools, all this can be effectively done. Islands usually aren't joined unless a special order is put out, and putting up ban lines and access lists takes care of unwanted interlopers. And for far far less cash. The sole benefit is the (still undefined and rumored) separation, in total, from the main grid. Which leads us to ask: how deep is that separation? The best would be a complete break from the central grid and its rolling restarts and crashes and such. I think M says as much.
Aside from the rolling restarts, has the grid completely failed lately? I can't recall it doing so recently although I will admit to have a lacking presence in Second Life lately.
The cost, that's the rub. I doubt it will be cheap. It will likely be very expensive. We don't know yet because M loves a good cliffhanger and promises to tell us 'this summer' which narrows it down to June through August. July? Until we know the details, we can only know that it will be completely separated from the grid and it's implied it will be expensive. It's targeted specifically towards big business and universities (although Openspace was supposed to target island owners who wanted to pretty their islands and we saw how that turned out). And it will have a beta phase, as M mentions an offer to apply to test the beta stage.
Oh, I just can't wait!
Sunday, February 8, 2009
We're Closed
Really now, when I saw this sign during one of my wanderings I could only wonder why Linden Lab does not put this up when log-ins are disabled. Rude, perhaps, but immature fun.
This way we wouldn't expect any kind of service from them. It would be a beacon: we don't care, come back later. Any complaints? Well, uh.... they are fairly transparent about it, aren't they?
....
Well, this is an old joke, isn't it?
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Cutting Up Cut Land
Some time ago, Jack Linden mentioned that the good ol' folks down at the Lab are considering doing something about land cutting.
I do not really feel up to looking up the entire post, which is worded in the usual Lab speak. There's going to be a more detailed and formal policy in February. I can't wait to see how they're going to carry it out. That's the great thing when Linden Lab decides to law down the law, waiting to see how good or how bad they implement these things. It's like Christmas all the time!
Jack did ask us, the residents, a set of questions to 'aid' them in the drafting of this law. Comments aren't showing up but I wouldn't post one anyway because they'd probably remove it. And they are herding everyone onto the forums which are also moderated. They have a nasty history of removing things they find slightly not quite to their liking. So I'm just going to sit here and answer them, out of the way of everyone, where Linden Lab can't touch me. Neener Neener!
First!
And if you answer 'no', you draw flak from those who are against ad farms. They will guilt you. They'll say, "16 sqm is the parcel of choice for ad farms and land extortion'. They will point out that there is no real use for such tiny parcels.
Perhaps we need some clarification of how Linden Lab would deal with this. Jack?
"The owning of cut land would not be a violation (unless you cut it in the first place), rather it is the act of cutting it that would be the violation."
Thanks for coming, Jack. So, cutting the land would be the problem. And here is where I think the question about land cutting lies with what you plan to do with the cut parts. I believe if you're cutting them up for a tasteful and reasonable purpose, then it should be your right. The problem lies in people who cut these things up and set them to sale for crazy prices (one was obviously set by someone being snarky: L$314,159,265 or thereabouts).
And those who cut them up to be annoying. Imagine buying a giant parcel, and discovering a tiny 16 sqm in the middle, the owner of it then erecting ugly towers in the middle of your lovely mini-mall or forest build or something lovely. Or erecting banlines on it, confusing your customers or visitors when they strike it.
I think that, with a few exceptions that will probably crop up, those are the two big offenses right there. That is what people typically complain about when they complain about land cutting. Land prices being set outrageously and ugliness being set upon them. That is the land cutting I disapprove and I think outside of that the little 16 sqm squares are fairly innocuous.
On one hand, answering his questions feels repetitious. But I suppose it is necessary because while I am single minded and feel fairly confident I could tell whether a 16 sqm is being abused or not, the general populace of Second Life is much more creative than me. I can easily imagine them reporting any kind of cutting of land, especially that of a rival or enemy. Jack is probably trying to angle and see how such a policy would be abused. Like the time I was reported for saying 'crap' in PG land. Me being cranky as I am, I then said, "Oh shit, I've been reported." and then dared them to report that. I mean, if I was having my neck placed under the ban hammer, might as well commit the offense I'm being strung for.
On the whole, I am sort of pleased by this. As Jack mentions, cutting up land is part of why the Mainland looks like a war zone in places. Nunchuck help us, though, if they rush in on this. As history shows, when they make up their minds, it takes a lot of energy to convince them they're wrong or need to change.
I do not really feel up to looking up the entire post, which is worded in the usual Lab speak. There's going to be a more detailed and formal policy in February. I can't wait to see how they're going to carry it out. That's the great thing when Linden Lab decides to law down the law, waiting to see how good or how bad they implement these things. It's like Christmas all the time!
Jack did ask us, the residents, a set of questions to 'aid' them in the drafting of this law. Comments aren't showing up but I wouldn't post one anyway because they'd probably remove it. And they are herding everyone onto the forums which are also moderated. They have a nasty history of removing things they find slightly not quite to their liking. So I'm just going to sit here and answer them, out of the way of everyone, where Linden Lab can't touch me. Neener Neener!
First!
- Do you agree in principle that land cutting needs to be a violation?
And if you answer 'no', you draw flak from those who are against ad farms. They will guilt you. They'll say, "16 sqm is the parcel of choice for ad farms and land extortion'. They will point out that there is no real use for such tiny parcels.
Perhaps we need some clarification of how Linden Lab would deal with this. Jack?
"The owning of cut land would not be a violation (unless you cut it in the first place), rather it is the act of cutting it that would be the violation."
Thanks for coming, Jack. So, cutting the land would be the problem. And here is where I think the question about land cutting lies with what you plan to do with the cut parts. I believe if you're cutting them up for a tasteful and reasonable purpose, then it should be your right. The problem lies in people who cut these things up and set them to sale for crazy prices (one was obviously set by someone being snarky: L$314,159,265 or thereabouts).
And those who cut them up to be annoying. Imagine buying a giant parcel, and discovering a tiny 16 sqm in the middle, the owner of it then erecting ugly towers in the middle of your lovely mini-mall or forest build or something lovely. Or erecting banlines on it, confusing your customers or visitors when they strike it.
I think that, with a few exceptions that will probably crop up, those are the two big offenses right there. That is what people typically complain about when they complain about land cutting. Land prices being set outrageously and ugliness being set upon them. That is the land cutting I disapprove and I think outside of that the little 16 sqm squares are fairly innocuous.
- Are there any legitimate reasons for land cutting (excluding profit) that we should consider when setting policy?
- With land that is already cut up, but still mostly owned by the resident that cut it, should we ask that the land be joined back together?
On one hand, answering his questions feels repetitious. But I suppose it is necessary because while I am single minded and feel fairly confident I could tell whether a 16 sqm is being abused or not, the general populace of Second Life is much more creative than me. I can easily imagine them reporting any kind of cutting of land, especially that of a rival or enemy. Jack is probably trying to angle and see how such a policy would be abused. Like the time I was reported for saying 'crap' in PG land. Me being cranky as I am, I then said, "Oh shit, I've been reported." and then dared them to report that. I mean, if I was having my neck placed under the ban hammer, might as well commit the offense I'm being strung for.
On the whole, I am sort of pleased by this. As Jack mentions, cutting up land is part of why the Mainland looks like a war zone in places. Nunchuck help us, though, if they rush in on this. As history shows, when they make up their minds, it takes a lot of energy to convince them they're wrong or need to change.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Evil Plans!
Sometimes I check people's twitters. I take them in small doses because each one is a small blurb and I find it annoying to read each and every one as it filters through every two or three minutes. The other day, I checked Torley's.
Goddammit, Torley!
Discussion is natural and healthy. It prevents the stupid from being carried out by allowing others to point it out before money and time is wasted following through. Like the asbestos football helmets or using mercury as a preservative in food or the man who decided the time was ripe for vitamin tablets in capsules made of plutonium. And you know, sometimes we discuss things before doing them to consider the financial cost. There's nothing like pouring millions into something and having it become a dud. And before you launch into a 'money doesn't matter if the ideal/idea is great, that's a load of bull, because in this world money is indeed everything (or a good part of it), and a lack of it is a serious handicap. It is very difficult to get something done if I'm broke. A little thought and discussion beforehand definitely would help.
Sometimes, it's important to discuss what went wrong and how to prevent it in the future. There may be lots of discussion and inquiries before anything gets done. And this is vital, because you don't want to try to fix what is probably impossible to fix. A well calculated move is worth ninety poorly planned and hasty calls.
Now, there is a point in that sometimes, discussion is rather pointless. For example, if asbestos is found over your place of work or residence, there's no discussion necessary to determine what to do or how to do it. You get it out, end of story. Sometimes you need a judgment call and a snap decision because you don't have the time. The idea, though, is to try to limit the number of times you have to act quickly and without debate. Let's think things throw, please. The snap judgment to use toxic and radioactive materials to encapsulate drugs may seem a good idea to keep them sterilized, but it obviously overlooks the fact that the end user would suffer.
Sometimes, Torley is right in that discussion may bog down an obvious 'right path'. In such cases, discussion and waffling over it is detrimental. You need to shut people up and just follow through already. I'd like to say, however, that such cases are few and far between. And sometimes, not waiting a few seconds and formulating a good strategy for accomplishing that path is worth it.
There's always special cases to everything. But I think a general good idea is to think something over before doing something rash.
Hey, here's an idea. Maybe if Linden Lab did a little less doing and a little more talking, they would do less 'pissing off residents' and make decisions that actually make everyone happy all around.
Goddammit, Torley!
Discussion is natural and healthy. It prevents the stupid from being carried out by allowing others to point it out before money and time is wasted following through. Like the asbestos football helmets or using mercury as a preservative in food or the man who decided the time was ripe for vitamin tablets in capsules made of plutonium. And you know, sometimes we discuss things before doing them to consider the financial cost. There's nothing like pouring millions into something and having it become a dud. And before you launch into a 'money doesn't matter if the ideal/idea is great, that's a load of bull, because in this world money is indeed everything (or a good part of it), and a lack of it is a serious handicap. It is very difficult to get something done if I'm broke. A little thought and discussion beforehand definitely would help.
Sometimes, it's important to discuss what went wrong and how to prevent it in the future. There may be lots of discussion and inquiries before anything gets done. And this is vital, because you don't want to try to fix what is probably impossible to fix. A well calculated move is worth ninety poorly planned and hasty calls.
Now, there is a point in that sometimes, discussion is rather pointless. For example, if asbestos is found over your place of work or residence, there's no discussion necessary to determine what to do or how to do it. You get it out, end of story. Sometimes you need a judgment call and a snap decision because you don't have the time. The idea, though, is to try to limit the number of times you have to act quickly and without debate. Let's think things throw, please. The snap judgment to use toxic and radioactive materials to encapsulate drugs may seem a good idea to keep them sterilized, but it obviously overlooks the fact that the end user would suffer.
Sometimes, Torley is right in that discussion may bog down an obvious 'right path'. In such cases, discussion and waffling over it is detrimental. You need to shut people up and just follow through already. I'd like to say, however, that such cases are few and far between. And sometimes, not waiting a few seconds and formulating a good strategy for accomplishing that path is worth it.
There's always special cases to everything. But I think a general good idea is to think something over before doing something rash.
Hey, here's an idea. Maybe if Linden Lab did a little less doing and a little more talking, they would do less 'pissing off residents' and make decisions that actually make everyone happy all around.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
The Grid's Finest
Today, I thought of a great idea for a new superhero comic. It is based upon Second Life and would feature the Lindens as the hapless protagonists trying to create a better world. Literally.
Since I have no ability to draw whatsoever (I once drew a picture of my brother, who thought it was a picture of some hairy can of Dr Pepper riding a scarlet loaf of pumpernickel) and my only writing ability is blog posting, which also happens to be my only actual portfolio of any writing at all, I would probably never be hired to publish it. And that is a shame, because all things considered it really can't get any worse than Superman and Batman. By the way, talk about an ego trip. "Super" man. Like the fact that he can fly and shoot laser beams directly from his retinas wasn't clear enough.
So, since I lack the attention span to write actual scripts, I'm going to give you the basic semblance of a few plots I thought out early this morning.
"The Grid's Finest"
Issue #1
In this exciting pilot issue, we are introduced to Philip Linden, a superhero that granted himself the powers of being a superhero in Second Life. He starts his career fighting lag and trying to earn notoriety on Wikipedia. But things go horribly wrong when Griefer McGreifsalot arrives and rezzes out a prim penis!
Issue #2
Philip uncovers a plot by Griefer McGreifsalot to post a Youtube video of two Second Life residents having cybersex. Can Philip reach him in time and save Second Life from negative PR?
Issue #4
In this heart warming episode, Philip Linden is on the trail of a puppy who lost its way. For 60 emotionally packed pages, Philip pursues the poor pup through a trail of traps, dungeons, lag, and an offline sim. Then, Philip realizes that children 18 and younger aren't allowed in SL, so he bans the child who asked him to help find the puppy. For good measure, he also bans the puppy. A tough decision!
Issue #5
The child returns! This time using his parent's credit card, The Helpless Child joins forces with Griefer McGreifsalot in a scheme to bring down the entire grid. Can Philip overcome his good heart and ban the child??
Issue #9
Griefer McGreifsalot escapes from the cornfield. Philip, in a heart pounding adventure, pursues him in the neighboring potato farm. Jimmy Carter guest stars as "Friendly local man who happens to resemble Jimmy Carter".
When interviewed about this issue, Carter said, "They wanted me to be a peanut farmer, but I felt that was cliche. So I asked them, 'what about potatoes?' I think it really changed the pace of the story and I am proud of that."
Issue #10
Griefer McGreifsalot escapes from the cornfield. Philip, in a heart pounding adventure, pursues him in the neighboring peanut farm. Jimmy Carter guest stars as "Friendly local man who happens to resemble Jimmy Carter".
To quote Carter: "I felt we needed to get back to basics. Peanuts. And griefers."
Issue #11
Griefer McGreifsalot escapes from the cornfield. Philip, in a heart pounding adventure, pursues him in the neighboring cornfield. Then, he realizes a pattern and decides to blow up the entire cornfield.
Issue #12
Philip has to deal with the consquences of blowing up the cornfield. Second Life suffers a famine, many families assault him with charges of blowing up their loved ones, and Griefer McGreifsalot gets off due to Philip forgetting to read him his Miranda rights. The pain is accented when Blue Linden reminds Philip that as a private company they don't have to read anyone their rights. A very touching scene involving Philip and a baguette leads to him regaining his sense of justice and duty.
Issue #16
Torley Linden is introduced. By day he is Torley Linden. By night he is ... The Tutorial Maker! Philip, realizing Torley's secret superhero identity, must team up to stop the Malicious Mentor from telling a hapless group of newbies that Second Life sucks!
Issue #19
All of Second Life suffers a blackout. Trouble strikes as The Child strikes again and Philip cannot log in!
Issue #20
Torley laments that Philip sees him only as a tutorial maker, and decides to film Philip saving the day. Unfortunately, he videos Philip changing from his alter ego Philip Linden into superhero Philip Linden! Torley must delete the video before Griefer McGreifsalot finds it!
Issue #21
Peace has reigned in Second Life for almost a week. Philip, bored, decides to slip in as an alt and have some fun. In reality, this is a thinly veiled attempt to have a bunch of babes and hunks run around in thongs to boost falling readership.
Issue #22
Philip wakes up with a massive hangover.
Issue #25
Second Life celebrates its 3rd birthday. But Griefer McGreifsalot causes trouble, and Philip has to duck out of the festivities and save the day!
Issue #28
Philip discovers the Grey Ghoul! At first he attempts to contain it, but he becomes curious and decides to run tests on it. When the lab explodes and the Grey Ghoul grows and grows, threatening to crush everyone in the grid, Philip is forced to admit his shameful secret: Griefer McGreifsalot released the Grey Ghoul. Despite his protests of innocence, Griefer McGreifsalot is banned, and Philip saves the day and his reputation.
Issue #30
Griefer McGreifsalot comes back... with a vengeance! He kidnaps Torley and threatens to have him executed at dawn! Philip scours the grid while Blue Linden find the two in the basement of the lab. Blue beats the crap out of Griefer and then asks him how Griefer thinks about the current state of the grid. It's a cliff hanger as all three forget Torley duct tapped in the basement.
Issue #31
Pressure is put on Philip as Prokofy, chief editor of the Second Life Daily Times, begins to investigate just who Philip Linden is! After much suspense, the day is saved when The Second Life Daily Times office building is destroyed by Griefer McGreifsalot. Philip catches Griefer McGreifsalot and slips him a twenty for saving his secret identity.
Issue #32
Prokofy discovers that Philip paid off Griefer McGreifsalot to destroy his office! As his investigation draws closer to the truth, Philip decides there is only one course of action, and decides to release the Grey Ghoul. Griefer McGreifsalot is blamed once again and once again the day is saved!
Issue #35
Copybot is introduced in this tale of horror! Philip, running up to fight Copybot, is startled as it copies Philip and throws Philip's superhero powers back at him! Even worse, everyone cannot tell the two apart! As the grid burns, the question becomes: WHO WILL SURVIVE?
Issue #39
The Child comes back, this time in an actual child avatar! Philip has to stop him before SL residents become freaked out!
Issue #40
It's a hot summer day and lag on the grid mounts. Despite his best efforts, Philip is confounded and his sidekicks Blue and Torley are forced to take over the Big Job when Philip succumbs to a crash! Can they solve the mystery before the economics report has to be skewed!?
Issue #41
Philip is still out and Copybot returns! Blue and Torley must team up to stop the menance!
Issue #42
It is becoming increasingly likely that Philip is not re logging. To make matters worse, some people are connecting the dots between Philip Linden and his mild mannered secret identity Philip Linden, both of whom have gone missing! To make matters even worse, Griefer McGreifsalot finds the Grey Ghoul!
Issue #43
A new hero arrives! But is she all that she is cracked up to be??
Issue #44
As the mysterious heroine sacrifices her life to save the grid from the Grey Ghoul, Blue and Torley are busy trying to determine whether or not to get rid of the current orientation island.
Issue #45
Philip returns! As a joyous crowd greets him, Philip delivers his explanation: "I was in the bathroom". Festivities are interrupted when Lag Muffin crashes the party... literally!
Issue #46
The Ghost Prim makes her debut. Philip Linden discovers the severed head of one of Griefer McGreifsalot's alts. Soon, the grid is in fear as this masked vigilante begins systematically annihilating the grid's worst elements. Philip must hurry, for when the clock strikes twelve, The Ghost Prim's work will be completed, putting Philip out of a job!
Issue #47
Ghost Prim, having eluded Philip Linden, discovers Griefer McGreifsalot's main account. As he begs for mercy, claiming to have reformed and that he didn't actually kill anyone and no harm was done, Ghost severs his head with a rusty golf club. She then places his head atop a pole at Orientation island to warn newbies of the price of crime. Can Philip stop this menace?
Issue #48
Prokofy and Philip team up to discover the secret of Ghost Prim! Just who is she?? As the number of crashes plummet and lag almost disappearing, time is running out for Philip Linden!
Issue #49
Philip and the gang confront Ghost Prim. Blue is taken out with blow to the forehead, while Torley is distracted with a newbie asking for help. Forced to face Ghost alone, Philip gears for the fight of his life!
Issue #50
As the memorial service for Griefer McGreifsalot is held, a new masked villian, Dirigible Don, attacks! No one is surprised when Ghost Prim kills him five minutes later.
Issue #51
Vigilante Ghost Prim is still on the loose, doing Philip's job nine times more effectively! As mild mannered CEO Philip Linden, Philip discovers the Ghost Prim's secret identity: Sar4h Hax! He is torn between stopping a vicious criminal and allowing her to continue the fight against crime!
Issue #52
As the memorial service for Ghost Prim is held, rumors arise that Philip did not just 'accidently' drop a titanium I-beam upon Sar4h Hax's head. A web of deceit, lies, and surreality is delved through as Philip uncovers the deadly truth! Can he stop the real criminal in time to save Blue Linden from Sar4h's fate??
Issue #54
Trouble abounds when Chief Justice of the Supreme Court John Jay serves Philip a subpoena on the case of Sar4h Hax's death. When Griefer McGreifsalot's son, Alabaster McGreifsalot, serves The Honorable John Jay a subpoena of his own, Philip shows Jay the power of true love as he beats Alabaster to a merciful pulp. In exchange for L$ 5,000,000 , Jay agrees to suspend the investigation, much to Prokofy's chagrin.
Issue #55
The current issue! Philip and the Gang convene at headquarters to discuss a somber topic: who will replace Philip when he dies or stops logging in due to boredom? At first light hearted, Blue and Torley take the Replacement contest too seriously in an attempt to win the coveted top spot! Both are foiled when Alabaster McGreifsalot wins! They team together to uncover the hideous villain to Philip! In his gratitude, Philip decides to deny both of them and appoint M Linden as his replacement.
Since I have no ability to draw whatsoever (I once drew a picture of my brother, who thought it was a picture of some hairy can of Dr Pepper riding a scarlet loaf of pumpernickel) and my only writing ability is blog posting, which also happens to be my only actual portfolio of any writing at all, I would probably never be hired to publish it. And that is a shame, because all things considered it really can't get any worse than Superman and Batman. By the way, talk about an ego trip. "Super" man. Like the fact that he can fly and shoot laser beams directly from his retinas wasn't clear enough.
So, since I lack the attention span to write actual scripts, I'm going to give you the basic semblance of a few plots I thought out early this morning.
"The Grid's Finest"
Issue #1
In this exciting pilot issue, we are introduced to Philip Linden, a superhero that granted himself the powers of being a superhero in Second Life. He starts his career fighting lag and trying to earn notoriety on Wikipedia. But things go horribly wrong when Griefer McGreifsalot arrives and rezzes out a prim penis!
Issue #2
Philip uncovers a plot by Griefer McGreifsalot to post a Youtube video of two Second Life residents having cybersex. Can Philip reach him in time and save Second Life from negative PR?
Issue #4
In this heart warming episode, Philip Linden is on the trail of a puppy who lost its way. For 60 emotionally packed pages, Philip pursues the poor pup through a trail of traps, dungeons, lag, and an offline sim. Then, Philip realizes that children 18 and younger aren't allowed in SL, so he bans the child who asked him to help find the puppy. For good measure, he also bans the puppy. A tough decision!
Issue #5
The child returns! This time using his parent's credit card, The Helpless Child joins forces with Griefer McGreifsalot in a scheme to bring down the entire grid. Can Philip overcome his good heart and ban the child??
Issue #9
Griefer McGreifsalot escapes from the cornfield. Philip, in a heart pounding adventure, pursues him in the neighboring potato farm. Jimmy Carter guest stars as "Friendly local man who happens to resemble Jimmy Carter".
When interviewed about this issue, Carter said, "They wanted me to be a peanut farmer, but I felt that was cliche. So I asked them, 'what about potatoes?' I think it really changed the pace of the story and I am proud of that."
Issue #10
Griefer McGreifsalot escapes from the cornfield. Philip, in a heart pounding adventure, pursues him in the neighboring peanut farm. Jimmy Carter guest stars as "Friendly local man who happens to resemble Jimmy Carter".
To quote Carter: "I felt we needed to get back to basics. Peanuts. And griefers."
Issue #11
Griefer McGreifsalot escapes from the cornfield. Philip, in a heart pounding adventure, pursues him in the neighboring cornfield. Then, he realizes a pattern and decides to blow up the entire cornfield.
Issue #12
Philip has to deal with the consquences of blowing up the cornfield. Second Life suffers a famine, many families assault him with charges of blowing up their loved ones, and Griefer McGreifsalot gets off due to Philip forgetting to read him his Miranda rights. The pain is accented when Blue Linden reminds Philip that as a private company they don't have to read anyone their rights. A very touching scene involving Philip and a baguette leads to him regaining his sense of justice and duty.
Issue #16
Torley Linden is introduced. By day he is Torley Linden. By night he is ... The Tutorial Maker! Philip, realizing Torley's secret superhero identity, must team up to stop the Malicious Mentor from telling a hapless group of newbies that Second Life sucks!
Issue #19
All of Second Life suffers a blackout. Trouble strikes as The Child strikes again and Philip cannot log in!
Issue #20
Torley laments that Philip sees him only as a tutorial maker, and decides to film Philip saving the day. Unfortunately, he videos Philip changing from his alter ego Philip Linden into superhero Philip Linden! Torley must delete the video before Griefer McGreifsalot finds it!
Issue #21
Peace has reigned in Second Life for almost a week. Philip, bored, decides to slip in as an alt and have some fun. In reality, this is a thinly veiled attempt to have a bunch of babes and hunks run around in thongs to boost falling readership.
Issue #22
Philip wakes up with a massive hangover.
Issue #25
Second Life celebrates its 3rd birthday. But Griefer McGreifsalot causes trouble, and Philip has to duck out of the festivities and save the day!
Issue #28
Philip discovers the Grey Ghoul! At first he attempts to contain it, but he becomes curious and decides to run tests on it. When the lab explodes and the Grey Ghoul grows and grows, threatening to crush everyone in the grid, Philip is forced to admit his shameful secret: Griefer McGreifsalot released the Grey Ghoul. Despite his protests of innocence, Griefer McGreifsalot is banned, and Philip saves the day and his reputation.
Issue #30
Griefer McGreifsalot comes back... with a vengeance! He kidnaps Torley and threatens to have him executed at dawn! Philip scours the grid while Blue Linden find the two in the basement of the lab. Blue beats the crap out of Griefer and then asks him how Griefer thinks about the current state of the grid. It's a cliff hanger as all three forget Torley duct tapped in the basement.
Issue #31
Pressure is put on Philip as Prokofy, chief editor of the Second Life Daily Times, begins to investigate just who Philip Linden is! After much suspense, the day is saved when The Second Life Daily Times office building is destroyed by Griefer McGreifsalot. Philip catches Griefer McGreifsalot and slips him a twenty for saving his secret identity.
Issue #32
Prokofy discovers that Philip paid off Griefer McGreifsalot to destroy his office! As his investigation draws closer to the truth, Philip decides there is only one course of action, and decides to release the Grey Ghoul. Griefer McGreifsalot is blamed once again and once again the day is saved!
Issue #35
Copybot is introduced in this tale of horror! Philip, running up to fight Copybot, is startled as it copies Philip and throws Philip's superhero powers back at him! Even worse, everyone cannot tell the two apart! As the grid burns, the question becomes: WHO WILL SURVIVE?
Issue #39
The Child comes back, this time in an actual child avatar! Philip has to stop him before SL residents become freaked out!
Issue #40
It's a hot summer day and lag on the grid mounts. Despite his best efforts, Philip is confounded and his sidekicks Blue and Torley are forced to take over the Big Job when Philip succumbs to a crash! Can they solve the mystery before the economics report has to be skewed!?
Issue #41
Philip is still out and Copybot returns! Blue and Torley must team up to stop the menance!
Issue #42
It is becoming increasingly likely that Philip is not re logging. To make matters worse, some people are connecting the dots between Philip Linden and his mild mannered secret identity Philip Linden, both of whom have gone missing! To make matters even worse, Griefer McGreifsalot finds the Grey Ghoul!
Issue #43
A new hero arrives! But is she all that she is cracked up to be??
Issue #44
As the mysterious heroine sacrifices her life to save the grid from the Grey Ghoul, Blue and Torley are busy trying to determine whether or not to get rid of the current orientation island.
Issue #45
Philip returns! As a joyous crowd greets him, Philip delivers his explanation: "I was in the bathroom". Festivities are interrupted when Lag Muffin crashes the party... literally!
Issue #46
The Ghost Prim makes her debut. Philip Linden discovers the severed head of one of Griefer McGreifsalot's alts. Soon, the grid is in fear as this masked vigilante begins systematically annihilating the grid's worst elements. Philip must hurry, for when the clock strikes twelve, The Ghost Prim's work will be completed, putting Philip out of a job!
Issue #47
Ghost Prim, having eluded Philip Linden, discovers Griefer McGreifsalot's main account. As he begs for mercy, claiming to have reformed and that he didn't actually kill anyone and no harm was done, Ghost severs his head with a rusty golf club. She then places his head atop a pole at Orientation island to warn newbies of the price of crime. Can Philip stop this menace?
Issue #48
Prokofy and Philip team up to discover the secret of Ghost Prim! Just who is she?? As the number of crashes plummet and lag almost disappearing, time is running out for Philip Linden!
Issue #49
Philip and the gang confront Ghost Prim. Blue is taken out with blow to the forehead, while Torley is distracted with a newbie asking for help. Forced to face Ghost alone, Philip gears for the fight of his life!
Issue #50
As the memorial service for Griefer McGreifsalot is held, a new masked villian, Dirigible Don, attacks! No one is surprised when Ghost Prim kills him five minutes later.
Issue #51
Vigilante Ghost Prim is still on the loose, doing Philip's job nine times more effectively! As mild mannered CEO Philip Linden, Philip discovers the Ghost Prim's secret identity: Sar4h Hax! He is torn between stopping a vicious criminal and allowing her to continue the fight against crime!
Issue #52
As the memorial service for Ghost Prim is held, rumors arise that Philip did not just 'accidently' drop a titanium I-beam upon Sar4h Hax's head. A web of deceit, lies, and surreality is delved through as Philip uncovers the deadly truth! Can he stop the real criminal in time to save Blue Linden from Sar4h's fate??
Issue #54
Trouble abounds when Chief Justice of the Supreme Court John Jay serves Philip a subpoena on the case of Sar4h Hax's death. When Griefer McGreifsalot's son, Alabaster McGreifsalot, serves The Honorable John Jay a subpoena of his own, Philip shows Jay the power of true love as he beats Alabaster to a merciful pulp. In exchange for L$ 5,000,000 , Jay agrees to suspend the investigation, much to Prokofy's chagrin.
Issue #55
The current issue! Philip and the Gang convene at headquarters to discuss a somber topic: who will replace Philip when he dies or stops logging in due to boredom? At first light hearted, Blue and Torley take the Replacement contest too seriously in an attempt to win the coveted top spot! Both are foiled when Alabaster McGreifsalot wins! They team together to uncover the hideous villain to Philip! In his gratitude, Philip decides to deny both of them and appoint M Linden as his replacement.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Twenty-one Life Lessons I Stole From Torley
I haven't lambasted Torley in a while, so today I'm going to engage in that favourite sport of mine. Let's begin. A few days ago he posted twenty-one life lessons he learned from 2008. I'm going to adjust them by translating them from Torley-speak to Anna-speak. Basically, adding my two cents to his points. Fun!
1) Love, always love first.
Yes, I like that art piece too. It is very lovely and framed nicely by a fountain.
2) Pets are pretty lame.
I once had a pair of snakes. They smelled, ate live crickets, and tried to bite me. I thought snakes would be nice, because at the zoo they always looked so lazy and peaceful. Before you call me an idiot, I was six at the time.
I had an endless run of goldfish. Technically, they weren't goldfish sometimes, but I can't remember the specific names so I'm lumping them all under 'goldfish'. One pair were inadvertently a male and female of the same species and I awoke one morning to find small fry in the tank. Here is how it went: the new mom and dad promptly ate a good ninety percent of them. I managed to sequester them into a separate tank. The ones remaining grew up although some of their siblings ate each other too. Exactly three made it to full adulthood. They all died about a week after doing so. No more fish.
I had a dog, a pekingese, who was probably the best of all the pets I've had. She was quiet and lay around the house all day long, so it was easy to be around her, and just pet her. I think the worst was when she wet a blanket of my brother's, who was about three at the time, and he got upset. I was secretly pleased.
One of my aunts had cats. I had read Garfield and thought cats were awesome at the time. Her cats ran from me, and when I went to sit down, one came up and clawed me in the chest. I was scarred for weeks. Cats are jerks. Even Torley's new cat is a jerk. He headbutted Torley, who laughed it off as personality. He was probably trying to bite Torley, but being a stupid cat forgot to use his mouth. Torley insists he's a good cat, but consider that he also insists Linden Lab are a bunch of good guys.
Pets are lame.
3) Live it up when you're praised.
People are bigger jerks than cats. So when a bunch of jerks think you've done something to warrant congratulations, live it up. It probably won't happen often.
The only bad thing is that people can quickly turn on you. Sure, they like you now, and say 'thank you thank you', but the minute you can't deliver because of some honest reason (and not something like "I don't feel like it") they'll turn on you like ravenous wolves. Hey, just look at Linden Lab. They can do an update that makes the viewer run smoothly, and everyone will thank them. They pull a bait-and-switch of sorts on OpenSims, and suddenly everyone hates them. Go figure.
So go ahead, be a jerk, and swagger about when people praise you. Boast a little, even. You only live once, and in that one life you only get fifteen minutes of fame, so live it up while you can.
4) To Hell with others
People are jerks, bigger jerks than cats. Often, as in 99.99999% of the time, they won't praise you, but attack you for whatever faults whether real or perceived. So go ahead and be as sharp, cynical, and harsh on them as they are to you. Give a little back. Don't be a wet rag and just absorb it, because they'll see that as a sign of weakness and keep at it. Nitpick everything they do to show that you care.
The only exceptions are people who you've found to be truly nice and perhaps good friends. Everyone else is a jerk. Don't give them more than what they deserve. If they don't like it, well, I don't like them. Because they're jerks. Like cats.
Nunchuck, I hate cats.
5) Criticism is Everything.
Here is where I think Torley is completely stupid. Monumentally stupid. So idiotic, up there with the genius who didn't include a third hull on the Titanic and (soon to be former) President Bush. Hell, either Bush. And throw in a half of a Clinton. Two Bushes and a half Clinton aren't as stupid as this realization of Torley's.
He claims that the majority of criticism, even constructive criticism, just isn't applicable. To find out what he means, I checked out his PDF on the subject. Let's see here, saying the bashing of the Wii's name was ok because people heard about it and thus through bashing the Wii wanted to buy it. Torley, let's be honest, it's a completely asinine name. Just like this criticism is worthless idea. The Wii did well because people liked what they saw about the games and the hardware. This would have happened whether or not it had a normal name or not. (and to be fair, Playstation 3 is stupid too, make up a new name already. And XBox sounds ugly). Nintendo got lucky that people attached to it, because with dumb names there's always a chance it could go negative. Torley has taken one case of a bad name and claims that criticism of it was ignored to the product's benefit.
Reading on... 'Search for the Exceptionals'? Sounds like 'focus on one person saying 'hurrah' to ninety people saying you stink'. That's fine, unless you really do stink and the one person saying 'hurrah' is a skunk. Praise is always nice (and of course live it up) but there's always one idiot who agrees or likes you no matter what. If we're going to filter stupid critics from smart ones, we might as well filter praise too. It's only fair and probably just as constructive so as to keep from an overinflated ego.
Reading on... ah, finally, after 11 pages of babbling about antedotes (which in my opinion don't really help his case, though I too am a victim of babbling and stupid antedotes), he gets to the meat of his arguments of why criticism is worthless (before, he just talked about how to 'handle' criticism, mostly by 'ignoring them', surprise surprise). Although, as I've said, I am wont to wander when making a point as well.
Ok, he pulls the old 'if you haven't done it, you can't knock it'. That's stupid. Imagine you are a taste tester at a kitchen. The chef makes 'shit-on-a-stick' and you rightly say it tastes like shit. He responds by saying if you haven't cooked before, you have no right to criticize. And you can inherently feel that is bullshit. A movie critic does not have to be in the business of making movies to tell that a movie is a bust. One does not need to be an engineer to find the idiocy of a design. All these cases, the critic has no hand in the 'get it done'. And no matter how much execution you put into it, there is no right way to make an automatic nose picker. An engineer who designs such a thing will be laughed at for the virtue of it being a stupid idea. It doesn't matter that Joe Shmoe doesn't understand the complex circuiting, mechanical balance and forces and actions, and computer programming that went into it.
The next point is 'only trust after their criticism has helped you improve'. Fair enough, after all, if some idiot says that I don't use enough adverbs I can reasonably say that improving in that direction is worthless and ignores the content and construct of writing. But it is a dangerous line, because sometimes it is damn hard to improve. How do you judge improvement? What if the learning curve is so great that improvements are tiny increments, barely noticeable? By that reasoning, all criticism, however valid, is worthless because it has not helped me improve even if their direction is the only way to improve. Take, for example, learning calculus. First, I need to learn basic math. But basic math is hard. What if I say to myself "to hell with division, I'm only doing multiplication". My teachers rightly point out that is wrong and tell me to work my division. But if I barely improve, then I can say their criticism is worthless and thus invalid even though it is true. What I am trying to say is, if you are going to follow this point, to do so carefully and with great thought. I know Torley has refined this and has a good head for it, but telling others this without warning to really really think it through is dangerous and a disservice to those who might need to be beaten into doing better.
"Subject your critics to psych tests" is another one that kinds falls flat. He makes a good point that it is best for a critic to offer not just what is wrong but how to make it better. But he also says to ask if the critic is familiar with the person, as if that should make a difference. It is like the above: can be useful if treaded softly and I have no doubt Torley does so, but people are idiots and probably will take it too far. Imagine if the chef from above says that you don't know him, the way he slaved through cooking college, and the heart he put into that shit-on-a-stick and so your criticism is worthless or at least flawed. Or perhaps because I am not a big fan of eating shit and can't appreciate the wonderful new direction this guy is taking by cooking with shit. See how dumb it is? It's something that has to be well thought out, but probably won't be done so. As a result, anyone who reads this will be stupid when responding to criticism, which coincidentally will probably lead them to not bothering with that person anymore and thus lead to the chef feeling validated by Torley's suggestion that 'only critics who want to stick with you have valid criticism'. A vicious loop but really the only conclusion given the logic behind it.
Next is 'build a collection of good critics'. That's a good idea as it is true that a lot of people are just a hating bunch of idiots. Getting a stable of good, honest, and yet critical and insightful people to run your work through helps as you can cut the whole 'shifting through the crap' step of accepting criticism. I would still check the occasional writing from outside that clique, though, because variety is the spice of life. And someone else might have an insightful argument to make you would have missed otherwise.
There's more 'criticism is publicity' which really has little to do with why criticism is pointless, and then the end credits.
So, having dismantled why criticism is not pointless, I should probably say why it is so useful. The first is that even if people don't have experience with whatever you're doing, they might add an angle you didn't think of. Perhaps you're writing music, and some door-to-door saleman says your tunes are repetitive. Hey, he might have a point even if he's never touched so much as a recorder in his life (the instrument, I should clarify). A wide point of view is good and helps one become well rounded, and have an end product that might be fairly good all around as well.
Second, sometimes you have to grit your teeth and slog on. Sometimes there is no nice way to point something out. Sometimes, the only person pointing out the right path is nasty. Just take it. I will give a personal example. When I was learning physics, I would religiously convert everything into base units. This took lots of time and energy. My teacher told me that for someone who was getting A's, I was one of his dumbest students for being unable to see past base units. By Torley's definition, I should have blown him off. He doesn't know me, he was negative (and insulting), he obviously had no hand in my solving the problems, and learning to use things as they are was difficult and I thought it was pointless since I was getting the job done. But I slogged on, and eventually after a few years it's helped.
Hey, here's another example. A history teacher said I wrote like a thesaurus since I would never use a simpler word, and that sometimes the word I replaced had a subtly different meaning than I intended. Hey, he's teaching history, not English, so what could he know? He, too, was fairly mean about it. And wasn't it best to expand my vocabulary? But I didn't. I took it to heart, and worked at watching my words, and how I used them. He didn't tell me what to do, but I went and tried to learn myself how to improve. It's called doing my own homework, even if the critic didn't know the way I could improve, he did point out what was wrong.
So yeah, I know all about criticism. I get critiqued ten times a day over stupid shit and some important matters. Like Torley, I can sift through what is pointless but unlike Torley I don't automatically disregard someone out of hand. I try to read into the critique. Sometimes there is a hint of truth buried into a vile attack. In other words, handling a criticism is hard work like any other job which you seek to do well in.
My point to you guys out in the audience is that yes, criticism is going to hurt. But the true skill is reading it. And interpreting it without dismissing it due to some superficial details. Sometimes, hidden in there, might be something that if you heed it can really make you go from mediocre to excellent.
My, that was wordy. My critique to myself: use less words, less meandering, and more to the point. Righto.
6) Diversify, but don't spread too thin
The only thing I have to add, because it is a very good idea to diversify, is to be smart about it. If you have no talent in an area, it's probably not a good idea to expand it beyond a hobby. As much fun as I have writing here, I will never pen the next Great American Novel. Writing at work is technical and so a completely different ballpark than the style of writing required here or in novels.
Hmm, actually, I have no idea how to word it. But be smart about things. A good general rule of thumb. Caution never hurt anyone. Heck, if the Titanic hadn't been in such a hurry it might have missed that iceberg. The Titanic was on TV the other day, hence why I have mentioned it twice now.
Also, cats are jerks.
7) Great Tools Save the Day
Oh good, here Torley has hit a grand slam. I cannot convey just how true this is. I have tons of stories of having to make do with something, cursing the entire while, and wishing I had just that right tool that I can never seem to find. Here, I can stand by Torley. "When life hands you Lemons, have a lemon squeezer handy" is far more apt than the way that saying was originally worded, and true. How many of us have squeezed lemonade by hand?
8) I hate computers
Torley makes some statement about how different operating systems can change your view. I will change that to my life lesson, which is that computers are horrible. They are like electronic cats. They never quite work right, and when you really really need something they always manage to screw you over.
Even Macs. Even Linux. I know it's just an inherent aspect of computers that something will be buggy and fail, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. And I don't like it.
9) Pace yourself.
Pace yourself. Then, you can afford to sit on something for a few days. You cannot know how well you can do something after a bit of thought. Sometimes, I'll write something, then upon reflection later, delete it because it's tripe. Sometimes, after reflection, I find a better way to word something. Sometimes, I find it's fine. And I can do that because I create a schedule and allot myself time to do so. Getting something done early is good. Having the time to adjust it is invaluably good.
So yes, get something done before the deadline and perhaps before the day ends. But definitely have the time to think it over later.
10) Don't drink coffee
I hate coffee. It screws up me. I find that, like above, pacing myself works well. That way, I don't have to pull all-nighters. So I have time to get sleep. Even when I have to pull all-nighters, I don't drink coffee because afterward it ruins my natural rhythm of sorts. And then you get addicted to the caffeine, so you feel like you need coffee to stay awake. You become dependent upon it.
Also, it stains your teeth. Eww.
11) Just spit it out! And follow through with it!
I credit Torley in that he really believes what he says. I respect him for that. I don't agree that you have to be 100% positive all the time, and that looking at the horrible bad side of things is good. It helps keep things in perspective, and point out all the horrible things that can go wrong, so I can make sure those horrible things don't happen or be made less horrible. Thinking of bad things is good. I suppose you could say that I negatively react to things, whereas Torley positively reacts to things. To each their own noose, I suppose (haha, because that's negative).
But I agree that being wishy-washy is bad. Making no decision is nasty. You get stuck in limbo. Just agree to something! If you disagree, then say so! If you think negatively instead of positively, then say so! Don't ride the fence. If you think there should be more time spent thinking something over, then spend that time going over new thoughts on it, and if you can't see any, then let's roll!
It gets easier with practice, trust me.
12) People are Jerks. So are cats.
People are jerks. Get used to it. Everyone hates you, except your friends (and some of those may be sycophants who will turn on you faster than Brutus on Caesar).
It is dangerous what Torley says about experts, though. I'm all for exploring new areas, but experts didn't get where they were by being stupid. If they say something is impossible or idiotic, they are probably right. And it is slightly offending to state that experts are content with the status quo, because if anything they too are in the drive to push the boundaries. Otherwise, they get left behind. I guess it depends on the type of experts. Torley mentions rich folk, I wouldn't consider them experts except maybe in a method of getting filthy stinking rich.
Also, I really don't like his suggestion to run psych experiments on people, especially without their knowledge. Jesus H Christ, Torley, do you know people have gone to jail for such things? That people have died under such things? It's called informed consent! And nothing, no matter how big a jerk they are or how invaluable you consider your experiment and its proposed results, allows you or me or anyone to override a person's choice to partake in your or mine or anyone's experiment.
And yes, I read the post he linked to. I still disagree. Intentionally trying to push someone's buttons to make sure they are the right 'fit' says more about you than the other person. For example, one case was testing money issues to make sure the other person isn't a Scrooge. But... what if that person is simply smart? If I loan you ten bucks, I expect it back. I am not a doormat, and if I follow the 'correct' path then I'm sure to be taken advantage. Is it cruel? Yes, but that's the way the world turns. I'm sorry. I am not a bank. Personally, that is why I usually tell people who ask for a quick loan that I'm broke, so they and I don't have to be in that situation. Tough beans.
The whole idea of 'testing' another person artificially doesn't sit well with me. People can change, and dismissing them because they get angry you told them they were supposed to be there 30 minutes earlier could be due to a whole host of reasons (a bad day at work, stuck in traffic, etc etc) and turn out to be either an edge case or something you could help them with and help them improve as human beings. Like anger management. Of course, if we ignore criticism then there is no chance of them listening to us, is there? I'd like to know also how they break it to the other person. They probably cop out and offer some bogus reason to wimp out of saying 'I was subtly testing you and you failed'.
13) It's okay to talk to yourself.
I talk to me all the time. Sometimes I agree, and sometimes they disagree. It's quite acceptable. It's not a sign of... what's that? He meant writing about yourself and not physically talking to yourself?
Oh. Uh... I mean, yeah. Talking about yourself. Well. That's good. Just no ego trips. Nobody likes braggarts. Otherwise, go right ahead. They say your best promoter is yourself. Or something. Anna are not sure what I meant.
14) Sweat the small stuff
First off Torley, if you repeated yourself 1,000%, the majority of your post would have been the word 'Iterate' about a thousand times over.
But good point. Don't overlook the small stuff. Sometimes it really helps out, other times it's only the icing on the cake. But check it out regardless.
15) Money Stinks
I wish we didn't need money. It seems to cause so many problems. But we do need it, it's unavoidable, so I deal with it like I deal with cats and people who own them.
I really hate cats.
16) Time is Money
Nothing else to say about it.
17) Don't Burn your Bridges
I am not sure what he's trying to say here (is his music a hobby now that he works for the Lindens?) but I wouldn't delegate any previous career into a hobby. Carry those skills! If you were an employee instead of self-employed, stay in contact! Social networking! Woot!
Stay at your A game, even if that's not your current line of work, because you just never know. YOU NEVER KNOW. I never know.
18) Just say No
I have found myself saying "no" all year. Mostly to those people on the street asking for change. Once to someone who wanted to cheat. Lots of other stuff. It's made me feel like a real jerk. But consider the truth that people are jerks, and I fit right in!
So, to reinforce Torley's point, just say No. If it makes you feel like a jerk, then take pride in that you're perfectly normal.
19) Remember the Message and the Spirit
What is Christmas? Is it a time of celebrating the birth of a savior and the promise and hope of such an event? A time of hope in a season renowned for everything being dead or in hibernation? A flicker of happy times in the frost and cold and harsh? A time to spend with family, around a warm fire, and enjoy the pure selflessness of giving time and money into a gift for one another? Or is it just wantonly gifting and spending away for your friends and family?
I urge you guys, remember the spirit. When I read that a guy was trampled by shoppers, I died a little inside. Please, prove me wrong that people are jerks, don't affirm it. When that happened, it said to me that those shoppers valued material objects over the life of a fellow human being. Is this what we want? Is this acceptable to us? Don't kid yourselves, either. It could have happened anywhere in the mass stampede that occurred across the US, just that particular store hit the Sad Lottery.
So, on the holidays? Take a breather. Relax. Enjoy it. And don't kill each other. For Nunchuck's sake.
20) Discussion is better than regretting something later.
Full steam ahead only works if you're steaming in a good direction. Debate is a good and healthy part of life. You would want me to debate whether to sentence you to life in prison or into lethal injection. You would not want me to just go ahead and execute you.
Not to say that once a good path is clear to keep squabbling. But healthy discourse leads to a better decision than wantonly acting, which ironically may lead to more intense debates than before.
No debate, though, on cats. Cats are jerks.
21) Love!
I have no idea why Torley is obsessed with this. I think I might make him a small (inches size) statue of the LOVE piece. As a present for... Martin Luther King Jr Day? He's sure to love it.
In summary, like all of Torley's posts half of it is close to garbage and the other half pretty insightful. Actually, I think I'm exaggerating. To be fair, a good 75% of it I liked. But all his crap on criticism irks me. It conjures an image in my head of something sticking their fingers in their ears and singing 'la la la can't hear you, you don't matter'. The details behind it, some of it I find completely wrong and the other half of it I find an extremely thin line of judgment. What is infuriating is he has good advice sprinkled in there, though rarely. Like 'take the care to evaluate your critics and dismiss the trolls'. But then he'll say things like 'if they don't offer to help you, don't bother doing your own homework, just dismiss them out of hand' or 'if they haven't tried it, then they can't criticise'. EEERGH!
I learned a lot examining his Life lessons. I recalled the repressed memory of how much I hate cats (except for Hugo the Lazy, and he's virtual). I learned that Torley loves a lot. I learned how cranky I am at 3 am in the morning.
So in that regard, I think Torley should be proud.
This is way late because I'm slow and I kept putting off completing this. Oops.
1) Love, always love first.
Yes, I like that art piece too. It is very lovely and framed nicely by a fountain.
2) Pets are pretty lame.
I once had a pair of snakes. They smelled, ate live crickets, and tried to bite me. I thought snakes would be nice, because at the zoo they always looked so lazy and peaceful. Before you call me an idiot, I was six at the time.
I had an endless run of goldfish. Technically, they weren't goldfish sometimes, but I can't remember the specific names so I'm lumping them all under 'goldfish'. One pair were inadvertently a male and female of the same species and I awoke one morning to find small fry in the tank. Here is how it went: the new mom and dad promptly ate a good ninety percent of them. I managed to sequester them into a separate tank. The ones remaining grew up although some of their siblings ate each other too. Exactly three made it to full adulthood. They all died about a week after doing so. No more fish.
I had a dog, a pekingese, who was probably the best of all the pets I've had. She was quiet and lay around the house all day long, so it was easy to be around her, and just pet her. I think the worst was when she wet a blanket of my brother's, who was about three at the time, and he got upset. I was secretly pleased.
One of my aunts had cats. I had read Garfield and thought cats were awesome at the time. Her cats ran from me, and when I went to sit down, one came up and clawed me in the chest. I was scarred for weeks. Cats are jerks. Even Torley's new cat is a jerk. He headbutted Torley, who laughed it off as personality. He was probably trying to bite Torley, but being a stupid cat forgot to use his mouth. Torley insists he's a good cat, but consider that he also insists Linden Lab are a bunch of good guys.
Pets are lame.
3) Live it up when you're praised.
People are bigger jerks than cats. So when a bunch of jerks think you've done something to warrant congratulations, live it up. It probably won't happen often.
The only bad thing is that people can quickly turn on you. Sure, they like you now, and say 'thank you thank you', but the minute you can't deliver because of some honest reason (and not something like "I don't feel like it") they'll turn on you like ravenous wolves. Hey, just look at Linden Lab. They can do an update that makes the viewer run smoothly, and everyone will thank them. They pull a bait-and-switch of sorts on OpenSims, and suddenly everyone hates them. Go figure.
So go ahead, be a jerk, and swagger about when people praise you. Boast a little, even. You only live once, and in that one life you only get fifteen minutes of fame, so live it up while you can.
4) To Hell with others
People are jerks, bigger jerks than cats. Often, as in 99.99999% of the time, they won't praise you, but attack you for whatever faults whether real or perceived. So go ahead and be as sharp, cynical, and harsh on them as they are to you. Give a little back. Don't be a wet rag and just absorb it, because they'll see that as a sign of weakness and keep at it. Nitpick everything they do to show that you care.
The only exceptions are people who you've found to be truly nice and perhaps good friends. Everyone else is a jerk. Don't give them more than what they deserve. If they don't like it, well, I don't like them. Because they're jerks. Like cats.
Nunchuck, I hate cats.
5) Criticism is Everything.
Here is where I think Torley is completely stupid. Monumentally stupid. So idiotic, up there with the genius who didn't include a third hull on the Titanic and (soon to be former) President Bush. Hell, either Bush. And throw in a half of a Clinton. Two Bushes and a half Clinton aren't as stupid as this realization of Torley's.
He claims that the majority of criticism, even constructive criticism, just isn't applicable. To find out what he means, I checked out his PDF on the subject. Let's see here, saying the bashing of the Wii's name was ok because people heard about it and thus through bashing the Wii wanted to buy it. Torley, let's be honest, it's a completely asinine name. Just like this criticism is worthless idea. The Wii did well because people liked what they saw about the games and the hardware. This would have happened whether or not it had a normal name or not. (and to be fair, Playstation 3 is stupid too, make up a new name already. And XBox sounds ugly). Nintendo got lucky that people attached to it, because with dumb names there's always a chance it could go negative. Torley has taken one case of a bad name and claims that criticism of it was ignored to the product's benefit.
Reading on... 'Search for the Exceptionals'? Sounds like 'focus on one person saying 'hurrah' to ninety people saying you stink'. That's fine, unless you really do stink and the one person saying 'hurrah' is a skunk. Praise is always nice (and of course live it up) but there's always one idiot who agrees or likes you no matter what. If we're going to filter stupid critics from smart ones, we might as well filter praise too. It's only fair and probably just as constructive so as to keep from an overinflated ego.
Reading on... ah, finally, after 11 pages of babbling about antedotes (which in my opinion don't really help his case, though I too am a victim of babbling and stupid antedotes), he gets to the meat of his arguments of why criticism is worthless (before, he just talked about how to 'handle' criticism, mostly by 'ignoring them', surprise surprise). Although, as I've said, I am wont to wander when making a point as well.
Ok, he pulls the old 'if you haven't done it, you can't knock it'. That's stupid. Imagine you are a taste tester at a kitchen. The chef makes 'shit-on-a-stick' and you rightly say it tastes like shit. He responds by saying if you haven't cooked before, you have no right to criticize. And you can inherently feel that is bullshit. A movie critic does not have to be in the business of making movies to tell that a movie is a bust. One does not need to be an engineer to find the idiocy of a design. All these cases, the critic has no hand in the 'get it done'. And no matter how much execution you put into it, there is no right way to make an automatic nose picker. An engineer who designs such a thing will be laughed at for the virtue of it being a stupid idea. It doesn't matter that Joe Shmoe doesn't understand the complex circuiting, mechanical balance and forces and actions, and computer programming that went into it.
The next point is 'only trust after their criticism has helped you improve'. Fair enough, after all, if some idiot says that I don't use enough adverbs I can reasonably say that improving in that direction is worthless and ignores the content and construct of writing. But it is a dangerous line, because sometimes it is damn hard to improve. How do you judge improvement? What if the learning curve is so great that improvements are tiny increments, barely noticeable? By that reasoning, all criticism, however valid, is worthless because it has not helped me improve even if their direction is the only way to improve. Take, for example, learning calculus. First, I need to learn basic math. But basic math is hard. What if I say to myself "to hell with division, I'm only doing multiplication". My teachers rightly point out that is wrong and tell me to work my division. But if I barely improve, then I can say their criticism is worthless and thus invalid even though it is true. What I am trying to say is, if you are going to follow this point, to do so carefully and with great thought. I know Torley has refined this and has a good head for it, but telling others this without warning to really really think it through is dangerous and a disservice to those who might need to be beaten into doing better.
"Subject your critics to psych tests" is another one that kinds falls flat. He makes a good point that it is best for a critic to offer not just what is wrong but how to make it better. But he also says to ask if the critic is familiar with the person, as if that should make a difference. It is like the above: can be useful if treaded softly and I have no doubt Torley does so, but people are idiots and probably will take it too far. Imagine if the chef from above says that you don't know him, the way he slaved through cooking college, and the heart he put into that shit-on-a-stick and so your criticism is worthless or at least flawed. Or perhaps because I am not a big fan of eating shit and can't appreciate the wonderful new direction this guy is taking by cooking with shit. See how dumb it is? It's something that has to be well thought out, but probably won't be done so. As a result, anyone who reads this will be stupid when responding to criticism, which coincidentally will probably lead them to not bothering with that person anymore and thus lead to the chef feeling validated by Torley's suggestion that 'only critics who want to stick with you have valid criticism'. A vicious loop but really the only conclusion given the logic behind it.
Next is 'build a collection of good critics'. That's a good idea as it is true that a lot of people are just a hating bunch of idiots. Getting a stable of good, honest, and yet critical and insightful people to run your work through helps as you can cut the whole 'shifting through the crap' step of accepting criticism. I would still check the occasional writing from outside that clique, though, because variety is the spice of life. And someone else might have an insightful argument to make you would have missed otherwise.
There's more 'criticism is publicity' which really has little to do with why criticism is pointless, and then the end credits.
So, having dismantled why criticism is not pointless, I should probably say why it is so useful. The first is that even if people don't have experience with whatever you're doing, they might add an angle you didn't think of. Perhaps you're writing music, and some door-to-door saleman says your tunes are repetitive. Hey, he might have a point even if he's never touched so much as a recorder in his life (the instrument, I should clarify). A wide point of view is good and helps one become well rounded, and have an end product that might be fairly good all around as well.
Second, sometimes you have to grit your teeth and slog on. Sometimes there is no nice way to point something out. Sometimes, the only person pointing out the right path is nasty. Just take it. I will give a personal example. When I was learning physics, I would religiously convert everything into base units. This took lots of time and energy. My teacher told me that for someone who was getting A's, I was one of his dumbest students for being unable to see past base units. By Torley's definition, I should have blown him off. He doesn't know me, he was negative (and insulting), he obviously had no hand in my solving the problems, and learning to use things as they are was difficult and I thought it was pointless since I was getting the job done. But I slogged on, and eventually after a few years it's helped.
Hey, here's another example. A history teacher said I wrote like a thesaurus since I would never use a simpler word, and that sometimes the word I replaced had a subtly different meaning than I intended. Hey, he's teaching history, not English, so what could he know? He, too, was fairly mean about it. And wasn't it best to expand my vocabulary? But I didn't. I took it to heart, and worked at watching my words, and how I used them. He didn't tell me what to do, but I went and tried to learn myself how to improve. It's called doing my own homework, even if the critic didn't know the way I could improve, he did point out what was wrong.
So yeah, I know all about criticism. I get critiqued ten times a day over stupid shit and some important matters. Like Torley, I can sift through what is pointless but unlike Torley I don't automatically disregard someone out of hand. I try to read into the critique. Sometimes there is a hint of truth buried into a vile attack. In other words, handling a criticism is hard work like any other job which you seek to do well in.
My point to you guys out in the audience is that yes, criticism is going to hurt. But the true skill is reading it. And interpreting it without dismissing it due to some superficial details. Sometimes, hidden in there, might be something that if you heed it can really make you go from mediocre to excellent.
My, that was wordy. My critique to myself: use less words, less meandering, and more to the point. Righto.
6) Diversify, but don't spread too thin
The only thing I have to add, because it is a very good idea to diversify, is to be smart about it. If you have no talent in an area, it's probably not a good idea to expand it beyond a hobby. As much fun as I have writing here, I will never pen the next Great American Novel. Writing at work is technical and so a completely different ballpark than the style of writing required here or in novels.
Hmm, actually, I have no idea how to word it. But be smart about things. A good general rule of thumb. Caution never hurt anyone. Heck, if the Titanic hadn't been in such a hurry it might have missed that iceberg. The Titanic was on TV the other day, hence why I have mentioned it twice now.
Also, cats are jerks.
7) Great Tools Save the Day
Oh good, here Torley has hit a grand slam. I cannot convey just how true this is. I have tons of stories of having to make do with something, cursing the entire while, and wishing I had just that right tool that I can never seem to find. Here, I can stand by Torley. "When life hands you Lemons, have a lemon squeezer handy" is far more apt than the way that saying was originally worded, and true. How many of us have squeezed lemonade by hand?
8) I hate computers
Torley makes some statement about how different operating systems can change your view. I will change that to my life lesson, which is that computers are horrible. They are like electronic cats. They never quite work right, and when you really really need something they always manage to screw you over.
Even Macs. Even Linux. I know it's just an inherent aspect of computers that something will be buggy and fail, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. And I don't like it.
9) Pace yourself.
Pace yourself. Then, you can afford to sit on something for a few days. You cannot know how well you can do something after a bit of thought. Sometimes, I'll write something, then upon reflection later, delete it because it's tripe. Sometimes, after reflection, I find a better way to word something. Sometimes, I find it's fine. And I can do that because I create a schedule and allot myself time to do so. Getting something done early is good. Having the time to adjust it is invaluably good.
So yes, get something done before the deadline and perhaps before the day ends. But definitely have the time to think it over later.
10) Don't drink coffee
I hate coffee. It screws up me. I find that, like above, pacing myself works well. That way, I don't have to pull all-nighters. So I have time to get sleep. Even when I have to pull all-nighters, I don't drink coffee because afterward it ruins my natural rhythm of sorts. And then you get addicted to the caffeine, so you feel like you need coffee to stay awake. You become dependent upon it.
Also, it stains your teeth. Eww.
11) Just spit it out! And follow through with it!
I credit Torley in that he really believes what he says. I respect him for that. I don't agree that you have to be 100% positive all the time, and that looking at the horrible bad side of things is good. It helps keep things in perspective, and point out all the horrible things that can go wrong, so I can make sure those horrible things don't happen or be made less horrible. Thinking of bad things is good. I suppose you could say that I negatively react to things, whereas Torley positively reacts to things. To each their own noose, I suppose (haha, because that's negative).
But I agree that being wishy-washy is bad. Making no decision is nasty. You get stuck in limbo. Just agree to something! If you disagree, then say so! If you think negatively instead of positively, then say so! Don't ride the fence. If you think there should be more time spent thinking something over, then spend that time going over new thoughts on it, and if you can't see any, then let's roll!
It gets easier with practice, trust me.
12) People are Jerks. So are cats.
People are jerks. Get used to it. Everyone hates you, except your friends (and some of those may be sycophants who will turn on you faster than Brutus on Caesar).
It is dangerous what Torley says about experts, though. I'm all for exploring new areas, but experts didn't get where they were by being stupid. If they say something is impossible or idiotic, they are probably right. And it is slightly offending to state that experts are content with the status quo, because if anything they too are in the drive to push the boundaries. Otherwise, they get left behind. I guess it depends on the type of experts. Torley mentions rich folk, I wouldn't consider them experts except maybe in a method of getting filthy stinking rich.
Also, I really don't like his suggestion to run psych experiments on people, especially without their knowledge. Jesus H Christ, Torley, do you know people have gone to jail for such things? That people have died under such things? It's called informed consent! And nothing, no matter how big a jerk they are or how invaluable you consider your experiment and its proposed results, allows you or me or anyone to override a person's choice to partake in your or mine or anyone's experiment.
And yes, I read the post he linked to. I still disagree. Intentionally trying to push someone's buttons to make sure they are the right 'fit' says more about you than the other person. For example, one case was testing money issues to make sure the other person isn't a Scrooge. But... what if that person is simply smart? If I loan you ten bucks, I expect it back. I am not a doormat, and if I follow the 'correct' path then I'm sure to be taken advantage. Is it cruel? Yes, but that's the way the world turns. I'm sorry. I am not a bank. Personally, that is why I usually tell people who ask for a quick loan that I'm broke, so they and I don't have to be in that situation. Tough beans.
The whole idea of 'testing' another person artificially doesn't sit well with me. People can change, and dismissing them because they get angry you told them they were supposed to be there 30 minutes earlier could be due to a whole host of reasons (a bad day at work, stuck in traffic, etc etc) and turn out to be either an edge case or something you could help them with and help them improve as human beings. Like anger management. Of course, if we ignore criticism then there is no chance of them listening to us, is there? I'd like to know also how they break it to the other person. They probably cop out and offer some bogus reason to wimp out of saying 'I was subtly testing you and you failed'.
13) It's okay to talk to yourself.
I talk to me all the time. Sometimes I agree, and sometimes they disagree. It's quite acceptable. It's not a sign of... what's that? He meant writing about yourself and not physically talking to yourself?
Oh. Uh... I mean, yeah. Talking about yourself. Well. That's good. Just no ego trips. Nobody likes braggarts. Otherwise, go right ahead. They say your best promoter is yourself. Or something. Anna are not sure what I meant.
14) Sweat the small stuff
First off Torley, if you repeated yourself 1,000%, the majority of your post would have been the word 'Iterate' about a thousand times over.
But good point. Don't overlook the small stuff. Sometimes it really helps out, other times it's only the icing on the cake. But check it out regardless.
15) Money Stinks
I wish we didn't need money. It seems to cause so many problems. But we do need it, it's unavoidable, so I deal with it like I deal with cats and people who own them.
I really hate cats.
16) Time is Money
Nothing else to say about it.
17) Don't Burn your Bridges
I am not sure what he's trying to say here (is his music a hobby now that he works for the Lindens?) but I wouldn't delegate any previous career into a hobby. Carry those skills! If you were an employee instead of self-employed, stay in contact! Social networking! Woot!
Stay at your A game, even if that's not your current line of work, because you just never know. YOU NEVER KNOW. I never know.
18) Just say No
I have found myself saying "no" all year. Mostly to those people on the street asking for change. Once to someone who wanted to cheat. Lots of other stuff. It's made me feel like a real jerk. But consider the truth that people are jerks, and I fit right in!
So, to reinforce Torley's point, just say No. If it makes you feel like a jerk, then take pride in that you're perfectly normal.
19) Remember the Message and the Spirit
What is Christmas? Is it a time of celebrating the birth of a savior and the promise and hope of such an event? A time of hope in a season renowned for everything being dead or in hibernation? A flicker of happy times in the frost and cold and harsh? A time to spend with family, around a warm fire, and enjoy the pure selflessness of giving time and money into a gift for one another? Or is it just wantonly gifting and spending away for your friends and family?
I urge you guys, remember the spirit. When I read that a guy was trampled by shoppers, I died a little inside. Please, prove me wrong that people are jerks, don't affirm it. When that happened, it said to me that those shoppers valued material objects over the life of a fellow human being. Is this what we want? Is this acceptable to us? Don't kid yourselves, either. It could have happened anywhere in the mass stampede that occurred across the US, just that particular store hit the Sad Lottery.
So, on the holidays? Take a breather. Relax. Enjoy it. And don't kill each other. For Nunchuck's sake.
20) Discussion is better than regretting something later.
Full steam ahead only works if you're steaming in a good direction. Debate is a good and healthy part of life. You would want me to debate whether to sentence you to life in prison or into lethal injection. You would not want me to just go ahead and execute you.
Not to say that once a good path is clear to keep squabbling. But healthy discourse leads to a better decision than wantonly acting, which ironically may lead to more intense debates than before.
No debate, though, on cats. Cats are jerks.
21) Love!
I have no idea why Torley is obsessed with this. I think I might make him a small (inches size) statue of the LOVE piece. As a present for... Martin Luther King Jr Day? He's sure to love it.
In summary, like all of Torley's posts half of it is close to garbage and the other half pretty insightful. Actually, I think I'm exaggerating. To be fair, a good 75% of it I liked. But all his crap on criticism irks me. It conjures an image in my head of something sticking their fingers in their ears and singing 'la la la can't hear you, you don't matter'. The details behind it, some of it I find completely wrong and the other half of it I find an extremely thin line of judgment. What is infuriating is he has good advice sprinkled in there, though rarely. Like 'take the care to evaluate your critics and dismiss the trolls'. But then he'll say things like 'if they don't offer to help you, don't bother doing your own homework, just dismiss them out of hand' or 'if they haven't tried it, then they can't criticise'. EEERGH!
I learned a lot examining his Life lessons. I recalled the repressed memory of how much I hate cats (except for Hugo the Lazy, and he's virtual). I learned that Torley loves a lot. I learned how cranky I am at 3 am in the morning.
So in that regard, I think Torley should be proud.
This is way late because I'm slow and I kept putting off completing this. Oops.
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